Our expert says:
Martha, I apologize for taking so long to answer you. I hoped to do a podcast on this for you before answering on the forum.
I would also be concerned. It sounds like your husband finds it difficult to have sex with you in a committed relationship? Perhaps the domesticity of living together bores him?
When he masturbates, does he connect with you at all? Look at you or touch you? Can you ask him about masturbating, explore it with him? Or do it for him?
Do you wish to remain married to this man, considering it could be a sexless marriage? Or would you (and he) consider seeing a sex therapist/marriage counsellor for a few sessions? I think it is very important to be able to discuss what is going on, and why your sex life has changed.
You can always e-mail me on email@example.com for an appointment.
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