Updated 06 November 2017

Ask bra Mo: 'I hate visiting my in-laws'

Ever since I married their daughter, my wife’s parents don’t like me



In a few weeks my wife and kids are supposed to visit my laws for the Christmas holidays.

They keep bringing up the idea that I haven’t finished paying lobola.

I am not respected at their house. I don’t want to go, but I have to do it for my wife.  How can I get them to respect me?


Holidays can be tricky for some people as they have to contend with pesky uncles and smelly grandmothers.

However, if one feels that they are being taken for granted by their own family members it is time to take a stand. Have you ever expressed your problem to your wife? Perhaps she doesn’t know that your family is treating you unfairly.

She is supposed to talk to her family and make them aware of their unjust treatment. However if they still don’t want to change their ways, you need to tell them that you will not visit them.

What is the point of stressing yourself during the holidays when you are supposed to be in a joyful time? Be a man and don’t let people walk over you. Happy holidays!