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Partners
This is Step 8 of the Sexual Superhero programme for premature ejaculation which was developed by Jonti Searll.
The next level of Direct Sexual Response (DSR) involves your partner. It requires communication, communication, communication and patience.
Your partner is obviously aware of the problem and presumably would like to help. She has a vested interest in this. It’s a good idea for you both to read through the exercise before you start.
Discuss what’s expected of both of you, make sure you both understand what you need to do. Whatever happens, no judgement of yourself or your partner. Be patient, change will happen.
The first part of DSR with your partner involves manual, i.e. hand, stimulation of your penis.
- Get undressed, get comfy, use lubricant.
- You are going to lie on your back, your partner can sit next to you, between your legs, wherever she’s comfy. She’s going to start stroking your penis.
- When you get close to orgasm, not so close that you’re right on the edge, tell her to stop. Not one more stroke.
- Take at least five deep belly breaths. Relax your body.Then ask her to carry on stroking you.
- If you’re ultra sensitive, when she stops it’s a good idea to take her hands right off your body.
- Repeat this at least five times. Then if you’d like to have an orgasm, ask her nicely.
- When you’ve finished the exercise, talk about what you both experienced.
- If you asked her to stop a little too late, and it became an anti-climax, don’t stress. Communicate more clearly, ask her to stop sooner.
Give yourself a day between sessions.
(Jonti Searll, sensualist, October 2010)
