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Sexual superhero: breathing

This is Step 4 of the Sexual Superhero programme for premature ejaculation which was developed by Jonti Searll.

One of the biggest sexual secrets is breathing. In something so simple is enormous power.

Learning to breathe properly during sex helps in controlling your orgasm response, lasting longer, relaxing your body, allowing sexual energy to spread right through you rather than just being in your genitals and pelvis.

It also assists in intensifying sensation, which increases your pleasure and keeps you in the moment.

In the East, sex has been a subject of serious study for thousands of years. Pleasure was considered to be both an art and a science. Those proficient in its practice were honoured and valued members of society.

Many of the following breathing techniques have their origin in Tantra and Taoist wisdom.

One of the defining principles of Tantra is consciousness/awareness. For so many people sex is a part of life we don’t bring a great deal of consciousness to. In this sense I mean that we may spend a great deal of time thinking about sex, talking about it, looking for sex. But we’re not very aware of what we do sexually and why. We just do it and hope it feels good for all parties involved.

Breathing helps keep you conscious and aware and allows you to move into the higher realms of pleasure. Besides all that philosophical stuff, learning to breathe properly during sex is an invaluable tool to helping you last longer, delay orgasm and give you great sexual control.

As with all the other aspects of this programme, these techniques begin with helping with a problem but lead to other applications later on. Once again I must say: go slowly, get the first steps right, walk before you run. When doing any of the breathing exercises, stop if you get dizzy.

The power of breathing in helping you gain more sexual control is this: A normal orgasm is a contractive event. As you get closer to coming, your body tightens and your breathing quickens. Some people even hold their breath.

We tend to see these as involuntary responses. They’re not. The deeper you breathe, the more your body relaxes, the greater sexual control you have. Breathing and relaxation go hand in hand. You cannot be breathing deeply and be tense or contracted.

Weeks 1 and 2

  • Breathe as deeply into your belly as you can.
  • Imagine that there is a balloon under your belly button.
  • As you inhale, feel the balloon filling with air and your belly expanding.
  • Exhale, empty the balloon and let your belly relax.
  • 10 breaths.
  • Twice a day.
  • Don’t be concerned with how long your breath is, don’t hold it.
  • Just breathe in as deeply as you can.
  • Focus on the breath moving in and out of your body. When your mind wanders, come back to your breath. This is an important step in helping you increase your pleasure later.

You’ll also find that this exercise will have an amazing impact on other areas of life. When you’re stressed or tense, it will help you relax. When you’re stuck with an issue or problem, it will help you look at it from a different perspective, give new insight.

Weeks 3 and 4

  • Double your breaths to 20.
  • Do it twice a day.
  • At the same time use your imagination to visualise your breath going all the way down to your genitals, filling your penis and testicles.

Weeks 5 and 6

Now we’re going to take a step combining breathing with PC muscle contraction.

  • Breathe in.
  • Contract your PC muscles tightly.
  • Relax.
  • Breathe out.
  • Do it 10 times, twice a day. Don’t hold the contraction, squeeze your muscles to their max and release.

You may feel a tingle in your pelvis, energy that moves up your spine, up the middle of your body as you exhale. Enjoy it.

Weeks 7 and 8

Then next step is breathing in, contracting, holding the contraction and your breath for five seconds and then exhaling. Do it 10 times, twice a day.

Weeks 9 and 10

  • At least 20 deep breaths.
  • At least 10, 15 breathe, contract, hold.
  • Twice a day.

(Jonti Searll, sensualist, October 2010)

Go to Step 5: visualisation

Back to the Sexual Superhero programme

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