Many of us tend too feel shy about having sexual fantasies, or even guilty. But the experts say that a vibrant fantasy life is an important element of healthy sexuality, and should be encouraged in people who’ve suppressed it or simply haven’t had many fantasies before.
You could also try erotic books, magazines, art and movies for inspiration. Even those that aren’t explicitly erotic may serve to turn you on: some people find sweet old-fashioned love stories do it for them; others get excited by action movies.
If the subject matter of your fantasies makes you feel uncomfortable, remember that thinking something and acting on it really are worlds apart. The great thing about fantasies is that you are free to think, be and feel anything you like, because there are no consequences. But fantasising should be a positive experience; if you feel as if it’s getting out of control, or the thoughts are becoming intrusive and distressing, then banish them from your mind. Remember: you’re the director of this movie.