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Sex is like a sand castle. A foundation needs to be built, it then needs to be sculptured to perfection, and then allowed to be washed gently away by the sea.
Moving in for the kill too quickly will end the experience after a couple of hours. The trick is to draw out being with each other for as long as possible. There are many things that can be done prior to penetration. Abstaining from penetration for as long as possible will increase the anticipation of the act, and will intensify the moment of penetration for both partners.
This is easier said than done, however. The Kama Sutra describes 12 embraces that are designed for partners to be in sensual physical contact with one another without the act of sex.
These embraces usually occur naturally in relationships, but you can use them in preparation for sex. Try a selection of these throughout the day with your partner. You’ll soon discover that by the time the lights go out, you’ll have your partner more than ready for some steamy action.
The touching embrace
“When a man under some pretext or other goes in front of or alongside a woman and touches her body with his own, it is called the touching embrace.”
A soft unexpected touch can be very erotic. This act is a subtle display of affection, reminding your partner that you are still there, and of what is to come. Soft, unexpected touches throughout the day will do wonders in preparing your partner for the night of love ahead.
The pressing embrace
“When on the occasion of walking together a lover presses the other’s body forcibly against a wall or pillar, it is called a pressing embrace.”
Perhaps ‘forcibly pressing’ your partner against walls and pillars all day might become a bit much, but it is good to help emphasise the importance of pre-sexual foreplay. Passionately embracing your partner during the day shows them that you are still there, and that you’re still keen.
The twining of a creeper
“When a woman, clinging to a man as a creeper twines around a tree, bends his head down to hers with the desire of kissing him and slightly makes the sound of sut sut, embraces him, and looks lovingly towards him, it is called the embrace of the twining creeper.”
Though it is difficult to interpret what the sound of ‘sut sut’ is, what is important with this embrace is the display of affection the woman is giving. This embrace is a very personal one, and is a display of physical affection given by the woman.
The milk and water embrace
“When a man and a woman are very much in love with each other, and, not thinking of any pain or hurt, embrace each other as if they were entering into each other’s bodies either while the woman is sitting on the lap of the man, or in front of him, or on a bed, then it is called an embrace like a mixture of milk and water.”
This embrace can be interpreted as dry sex in modern terms. Simply, this means sex with your clothes on. Again, this is a very passionate act, and can be extremely erotic because of the concept of that small barrier of material that is the only thing stopping a couple from actual intercourse.
The embrace of the Jaghana
“When a man presses the jaghana (area between the navel and the thighs) of a woman’s body against his own and mounts upon her to practice scratching with the nail or finger, biting, striking, or kissing, the hair of the woman being loose and flowing, it is called the embrace of the jaghana.”
A little gentle pain can be an extremely sensual and erotic experience. Try soft scratches on the upper and lower back, or gentle bites all over the body. Body massages can also help get your partner in the mood, but be sure not to kill the night with over-zealous sexual aggression.
The embrace of the forehead
“When either of the lovers touches the mouth, the eyes, and the forehead of the other with his or her own, it is called the embrace of the forehead.”
This embrace is a very personal one, with the faces of the two lovers coming into contact. It is a gentle gesture of affection, and good for any relationship.
(Warren Vonk, Health24.com, August 2005)
(Picture: sensual embrace from Shutterstock)
