Childhood Diseases

Posted by: Debbie | 2008/07/29


three years old behaviour

my son is three and half and my daghter in 7 months.there dad works long distance,for the past three months.over the last month or so my sons behaviour has got terrible at home and school.he wont listen,he has terrible temper and throws things,slams doors uses terrible language ect.the school says it is because dad being away is taking its toll on him, his teachers at the school has changed three times in last month so not sure what to do, i have tried everything, please help.thank you

Expert's Reply



Your son is showing the symptoms of a psychological/behaviour problem which is called ODD or Oppositional defiant disorder. It could well be triggered by his father's long absences. It is important for him to be seen by a child psychologist as his symptoms are significant at this time.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

user comments


Posted by: debbie | 2008/08/04

thanks tasja, my e mail address is debra.coetzee at yahoo dot com

Reply to debbie
Posted by: Tasja | 2008/08/01

Hi Debbie
my e-mail is natasjacronje at hotmail dot com

Reply to Tasja
Posted by: debbie | 2008/08/01

thanks to everyone for there help and advise. the teacher was spoken to and believe it or not i can already see a change, thank you all so mom. TASJA, i would love that, cant believe how similar our situations are.thank you everyone  )

Reply to debbie
Posted by: Tasja | 2008/07/30

Hi debbie
My son is also 3 years old and my daughter 7 mnts.My husband also works away from home,overseas to be exact!My boy stay at home with me,i decided this when my girl was born(to be a stay at home mom)He cant be away from his dad ,practically never sees him ,and then he only gets to see me evenings and mornings.I decided one of us should be home to give them all the attention they need at this time in their life!
My boy is also very angry sometimes,throws stuff,shouts and so on.Every now and then i get very angry with him,but the best thing to do is to talk very nice and quiet to him.He likes the attention,and if i play with him and so on!I just think its a stage they are going through,they are starting to notice and test their surroundings,after all they are growing up!Just be patient and tell him all the ime you love him very much!ANd in the meantime my girl also needs lots of attention.Its tuff!
Maybe we can mail each other and support each other,sounds if we are in about the same situation,except my boy isnt in school yet!Are you interested?

Reply to Tasja
Posted by: debbie | 2008/07/30

thanks for all your advise and help. i spoke to his previous teachers at the school and they say they never had one problem with him. i spoke to the head master and she said the other teachers have confronted her about the " new"  teacher, she promised me she wold calll her in and discuss the problem and concerns that i have.i will get full report from her tonight.i am still worried abou the fact that now that she is aware that i have made a fuss about it that she will pick on my son. it is very hard, especially with the fact that dad is always away and my daughter (7months) still needs alot of my attention. just physically and emotionally drained

Reply to debbie
Posted by: Stef | 2008/07/30

Hi Debbie,
Sulke gedrag deur ' n kleuterskoolonderwyseres moet nie geduld word nie. As ek jy is, sal ek na die hoof v d skool toe gaan, en ek sal die kind wat uitgesluit was van die klas, se ouers vertel wat gebeur het. Daar is nie stabiliteit by sy skool nie. Elke keer ' n ander juffrou? Jy moet ook maar van jou kant af net probeer liefde gee, en nie op hom skree as hy aggressief raak nie. Ek weet dis moeilik, veral omdat jou man nie by jou is nie. Jy sal hier deur kom, jy moet net jou voet neersit by daai skool. Sterkte

Reply to Stef
Posted by: Star | 2008/07/30

Just keep in mind you are entering the fours, it really is worse than the two' s!

Kids need stability, including school. Definately look at the teacher first. Even if it means you need to change schools. That behaviour from the teacher is definately unexceptable. Locking a kid out of the class. What if he wonders off. They use time out or nauty chair most of the time. Have you talked to some of the other mothers or the head mistress.

Reply to Star
Posted by: debbie | 2008/07/30

i have discussed the matter with his school, they are having a problem with his current teacher. his dad has been working long distance for a few months can the problem only start when he got this new teacher?
this morning i saw this teacher locking a kid outside because he tripped and bumped another kid.she uses words like shut up ect, could the problem not be worsened by her?

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