Childhood Diseases

Posted by: Erica | 2012/02/07


Seeking attention

My 8yr old seems to be seeking attention. She asks her teacher every day for some form of medication, headache, tummy ache etc. She often does this at home but I have learn''t how to deal with this but now it''s impacting on her school. She is given lots of love and attention at home. She fights a lot with her younger sibling. She often does things after telling her not to. For example she is not to run in the house or jump on the furniture but often does this anyway. The other day she bit the buttons off the video games because she didn''t want her younger sibling to play with it. I actually don''t know what to do any more.

Expert's Reply



You have set out your concerns very well. It appears that your daughter is both attention seeking as well as being defiant in her behaviour and also very active with sibling rivalry. What also obviously concerns you is that she gets lots of love at home and still behaves like she does. She is showing some features of a psychological condition called oppositional defiance syndrome or ODD. I think it would be best to take your daughter to see a child psychologist.

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user comments


Posted by: Ina | 2012/02/08

At 8 your daughter is old enough for conversations. Speak with her without criticizing or preaching, ask HER what is wrong, what it is she''s looking for. Be sure to tell her how much you love her and that you want her to be happy. You will be surprise at how much she understands her own situation.

My daughter and I followed a less conventional method with my 10 yr old grandson when a couple of years ago he was also very attention seeking. Every time he complained about an illness or pain we knew was his imagination, we pretend to be overly worried and wanted to get him hospitalized. Worked like a bomb! Every time all his " symptoms'' disappeared magically! But this you should only do if you are sure there''s no medical cause for concern.

Good luck

Reply to Ina
Posted by: Tess | 2012/02/08

Your daughter sounds exactly like my 8 year old son. I think theres definitely a bit of jealousy at the root of the problem. We still haven''t quite figured out how to deal with him, but we are trying to show him that he is just as important as his little brother and to make him feel like the " big brother"  so he feels he has a place in the family

Reply to Tess
Posted by: Almay | 2012/02/08

Maybe she feels that her younger sibling is getting more attention. Start looking at her reaction when you give her younger sibling attention. It is good to make both your kids part of any activity or responsibility together. In this way they also grow knowing that they must work as a team and that they can count on eachother. Remember, nobody said it would be easy, there will be fights and complaints no doubt about it. Goodluck.

Reply to Almay
Posted by: linda | 2012/02/08

if she get discipline everytime and it still don''t work what could then be the problem

Reply to linda
Posted by: Clem | 2012/02/08

Children are masters of manipulation and sometimes being so " difficult"  is merely a from of manipulation. This being said I do believe that any form of discipline needs to be enforced and she needs to be disciplined when overstepping the boundaries. To shower her with love and attention is good but to dismiss her behaviour without discipline will have a long term effect not only for you but also for her. Discipline and follow through.

Reply to Clem
Posted by: annie | 2012/02/08

She needs an old fasioned hiding.

Reply to annie

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