Posted by: Kitty | 2009/08/28


Anger release

My son is turning 3 next week. He is going through a stage where he wants what he wants, and when he doesn' t get it, he will either hit me (one slap, where-ever he can reach, not hard) or he will throw whatever toy is near him. I think that he doesn' t know how to deal with this emotion, and so he lashes out. Sometimes when it happens, I tell him I will throw his toy away, seeing he doesn' t want it. This stops him throwing the toy at that moment, but it happens again when he is angry again.

I have heard that music is a good/positive way for little ones to release their anger. I was thinking of getting him a little drum and whenever he is angry, he can go beat the drum until he feels better. Is this a good idea? I don' t want to be creating emotional problems for him later in life, and I' m not sure how else to help him deal with anger.

What are your thoughts on this?

Expert's Reply



You are correct, your son is getting to be a little bit old for temper tantrums and it is completely unacceptable that he should hit you. You must be firm with him and show that you mean business. Speak firmly and clearly. Tell him to 'Stop that immediately!' when he starts with a tantrum. If he won't listen walk away from him. If he continues to cry and perform put him in his room and close the door. Tell him he can only come out when he is quiet again. Do this every time he starts with a tanrum. He will soon stop. Once you let him out of his room do not mention his tantrum at all but focus his attention on something. Drumming should be a good diversion.

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