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Childhood-diseases

Question
Posted by: annon | 2019/08/27

Q.

4 year to sleep in her own bed

From about a year old or so my daughter has been sleeping in my bed. She is now 4 1/2 years old. I have been divorced from her father for over a year and a half. She still sleeps with me :) She always wants to lie in my arms to fall asleep every night. when I tell her she is a big girl now and must go sleep in her own room, she tells me she can't because there are monsters in her room.... she see's her father ever second weekend and see's her brother's every weekend. weekends by her father, she also has to fall asleep in his arms. I have no issue with it as I am not in a relationship, but as some or other stage she will have to go to her own room. I've showed her a bottle i made with water and glitter saying it is "monster spray" she has sprayed it in her room - but still refuses to sleep in it.

Expert's Reply

A.

Paediatrician
- 2019/08/28

This is a very common problem. Your daughter is a little 'old' to still want to sleep in your bed, but the reason is obvious. She feels insecure in her bedroom and is looking for the security and comfort that she finds when sleeping in your bed. The original reason for this is the fact that you and your husband have separated and this causes her unhappiness and insecurity, all of which is perfectly understandable. Put her in her own bed every evening at bedtime. Read to her until she falls asleep. Put a night light in her room and tell her that this will help to get rid of the monsters. If she comes to your bed at night take her back to her bed immediately, comfort her for a while and leave her room. Do this every time she tries to get back into your bed. You need to be firm with her, but tell her that she is a big girl now with her own bed and she must sleep in it.

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