You can be all right, and go on to live a happy and successful life, if only you will allow yourself to do so. I do understand how awful things may feel for you these days. Sadly, this is not uncommon, but with time and some proper expert help, people find their way out of this gloomy state, and find what's worthwhile in life. Counseling helps, and sometimes medication adds to the benefits.
I'm sorry to hear that you hate yourself : I very much doubt that anyone else hates you, and I am sure there is nothing about you that deserves to be hated. More likely, you have not yet discovered all that is good about yourself, and haven't yet learned to like and enjoy yourself.
I don't know what things you feel you have failed at, but I'm sure that failure is not inevitable, and that whatever these upsetting experiences have been, you will be able to learn to succeed at most things ( none of us succeed at everything we think of trying ).
It may annoy you when people point out that 14 is still very young, and you have decades ahead in which to do all sorts of amazing things. It's good to be realistically ambitious, but don't be so hard on yourself when some things don't work out the first times you try them.
A counsellor could help you to review your strengths rather than only concentrating on your weaknesses ( as you see them ) and to explore how you can enhance your skills, including your skills at communicating fruitfully with others and relationship skills. I'd be surprised if you have not already been an important part of several other people's lives, even if they haven't told you or you haven't noticed it yet.
Very few of even the greatest people in history, had managed to achieve anything noticeable by 14 : these things take time. It takes time to recognize and develop your talents and skills and yo find the situations in which you can contribute most. The composer Mozart started as a brilliant musician and composer at a freakishly young age, but that sort of thing doesn't happen even once in each century. Thank goodness the many great people across the ages didn't get too impatient and give up earlier in life. Some showed their abilities in their teens, 20's, 30's or even later. Some great artists and writers were only recognized in their 60's.
There's time to find the way you will make your own mark in the world .
But as regards finding your way out of the present gloom and depression and this sense of hopelessness, there's no need to wait so long. Get help ; ask family, parents, friends, teachers, whoever, to enable you to see a psychologist or counsellor for an assessment and a discussion of your troubles, and how to solve the problems you face while learning how to efficiently deal with any other problems that turn up in the future.
Do this ; you're worth it !
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