Gosh, you do sound harsh, critical and unforgiving toward yourself, from ear to shining ear. And shrinks do not find depression or anxiety funny, or leprosy, or indigestion. My magic wand is away for repairs. But your whole message reads like an argument in favour of CBT counselling. Arrange for this, it should suit you and your style, and give you valuable tools with which to fret fruitfully.
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