14 March 2019

Hate giving oral sex? Try these expert tips

4 ways to upgrade the time you spend downtown.

Women require creativity when it comes to, well, coming: Research shows that only 30% of females can orgasm through penetration alone, which means you may have to use a variety of foreplay methods to give your lady the pleasure she deserves. That often includes oral sex.

And while cunnilingus is a normal, healthy part of most guys’ sex lives, our survey of more than 1 500 men finds that one in five men don’t love it. If you’re one of those guys, experts recommend the following tips to make it more fun for both of you.

Read more: 8 things women wish you would stop doing during oral sex

1. Don’t be a fool and rush in

Don’t head south right away. Spend some time kissing her lips, caressing her breasts, and using finger play to stoke her sexual fires.

“The closer you bring her to orgasm before oral begins, the less time you’ll have to spend down there,” says Emily Morse, a sexologist and author of Hot Sex: Over 200 Things You Can Try Tonight.

At the same time, research from the Netherlands indicates sexual arousal shuts off your “disgust reflex”. While there’s nothing dirty about women’s (or men’s) genitals, fooling around upstairs for 10 or 15 minutes may turn you on so much that giving oral no longer bothers you, the study suggests.

Read more: 13 ways to give her a clitoral orgasm

2. Get wet and wild

Hit the shower. “Letting the water rain down dilutes the taste and distracts you from what you’re doing,” says Sonjia Kenya, a sexologist and medical research professor at the University of Miami School of Medicine.

Or grab a flavoured lube or powder. “There are about 48 million of these,” Kenya jokes  

Read more: We finally know how to have good shower sex thanks to this sex therapist’s tips

3. Tweak your technique

Consistent clitoral stimulation is the fastest way to get most women off, Kenya says. But if it’s the taste that bothers you, you don’t have to use your tongue as much as you think.

Instead, try blowing your warm breath over her clitoris to get her going, suggests Ava Cadell, author and founder of Then you can lightly flick your tongue over her clit, alternating from up and down, instead of full-on licking.

4. Practice your ABCs

Use your tongue to “write” the alphabet. This can act as a time-killing distraction, but also gives you the chance to notice which letters flip her ecstasy switch, Kenya says. (We’ve heard H and X drive women wild.)

If you can’t get an accurate read, simply ask her to tell you what feels good. The next time you’re down there, limit your efforts to those super-stimulating letters, and you’ll speed her toward blastoff.

Read more: The oral sex guide: What women really want

Additional reporting by Carrie Borzillo

Originally published on

Image credit: iStock


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