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19 August 2010

How to make your own celebrity sex tape

These days the path to fame and fortune is paved with surreptitiously leaked personal sex videos. To make your own, simply follow these simple steps.

These days the path to fame and fortune is paved with surreptitiously leaked personal sex videos. If you’re not a celebrity yet or if your fame is waning, a sure-fire way of rescuing yourself from obscurity and pauperism is to home-produce your very own explicit exposé. It’s worked for everyone from Paris Hilton, Fred Durst, Kim Kardashian and Kid Rock to Kendra Wilkinson, Pamela Anderson and now Laurence Fishburn’s 19-year-old daughter Montana.

To get your sizzling career started, simply follow these simple steps:

  • Wear decent underwear – you don’t want to be recognized by the hole in your Y-fronts. Just ask Joost.
  • Include longish sections with the camera out of focus. It’ll make the recording look more realistic.
  • Talk to your co-stars during the recording. People are always keen to hear other’s pillow talk.

  • Include any illegal stimulants or animals in the action.
  • Follow a script. The more amateurish and spontaneous, the more authentic your video will be.

 
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