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22 June 2004

Doctor, should I go to work or not?

Sometimes patients wake up with the flu and just know they can't go to work. What are the signs that someone is too sick to report for duty?

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Sometimes patients wake up with the flu and just know they can't go to work. What are the signs that someone is too sick to report for duty?

  • When they answer the telephone by saying, “Hallo Jeannette here” and the person on the other side says, “Good morning, Sir.”
  • When they have used up the month’s supply of toilet paper – on their noses.
  • When the thought of getting up out of bed to phone their boss, takes more mental preparation than the Comrades marathon.
  • When they are prepared to take a second bond on the house to get you to make a housecall.
  • When your patient's husband seals off half the house and has the Health Department put up Quarantine notices.
  • When your patient reaches the point where she doesn’t care that the presentation she has worked on for 6 weeks will now be delivered by the assistant secretary.
  • When they feel that their lungs are about to volunteer themselves for organ donation.
  • When their families stop saying “Bless you”, as they might become hoarse.
  • When they feel as if they have been volunteered for medical experiments without their knowledge.
  • When your patient is not recognised by the family dog.

- (Susan Erasmus, Health24)

 
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