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Posted by: slayer | 2006/07/14

Wow Lapdog! and other stuff...

Howdy Lapdog! I cant understand why anyone would have a problem with you on these boards because I certainly have never!
Where have you been? I need to know from you how the dope is affecting you, they say it can make people feel depressed. Why do you need to stop so bad not that I dont want you to. Why is it difficult to stop? Have you tried thinking of other positive things when you feel like taking a drag? Why not start exercise it will get you high and you will naturally start caring more about your body.
Perhaps your habit is brought on by boredom? Perhaps it fills something you dont have in your life, let's fill that void with something else shall we? Nice car! I care for you too and I know that you will find happiness with all the support of your family. :)
Hi cybershrink thanks for reading my really huge last post (the letter thingy) well I sent it and I'll try see both the docs soon.

Someone once said to me that people do things either out of love or fear. Is that true? Imagine living a life completely out of fear. "I will marry this person because I fear being lonely. I want to be a lawyer because I fear my parents will not respect me if I don't. I want to make lots of money because I'm frightened people won't like me." Imagine living out a life of fear! It must be a complete waste of time.
Then there is love, should I live my life out of love? "I do my job because I enjoy it. I married my wife because she is my best friend." My shrink agrees with me that in order to love you have to be a bit selfish. Why do people on this planet only love someone when they get something from them? Why dont they love people anyway? I dont love you anymore because: insert selfish comment here.

My shrink says that she would not love her husband anymore if he killed someone but would still love her kids if they killed someone. Weird? When is it reasonable to love or not to love somebody? haha. Oh come on now this is nonsense! When to give the carrot or the stick as they say. I cannot tell who I love anymore because would I be then saying it because I get something from that person. Man I dont get this planet. Is the most important thing in the world love? Is that what everybody wants? Nobody wants to give love to a child molestor because it does nothing for them right? I hate this fickle disgusting planet! I dont wish to be a parasite. Is it a case of give me love or give me death? Gary Zukav says the soul is pure love and that it is only the personality that needs to hurt. Interesting. What wishful thinking is this? A soul. That is the same wishful thinking that perhaps there is a God. Don't worry kids you have a soul and it is pure love, you are love. haha. I dont know if it's true or not but it's fun stuff!
You can die from too much love, yeah, too much chocalate cake! Do you think there is a person on this planet with no love from anywhere? I wonder if it is working for them? What I do know is there are plenty of people on this planet who get a kick out of hate, so what's the flamin' difference sir?
Thanks for your help!

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Hello slayer,
Look forward to eharing how the letter thingy works out.
I don't know that love or fear are the ONLY motivations for people's choices and actions --- many other less noble ones come into play, too, including greed and jealousy, among others !
And on the point you discuss with lapdog --- if after all of these years of evolution, we still do have emotions, including love, despite their frequent discomfort and inconvenience --- evolutionary theory would suggest they must have a greater value than this, in order to survive.
Hope the results of the operation turn out to be excellent, now that you've been properly grooved. It was my left arm that got mangled in the accident last year, and was so difficult to fix. Still left with a cotnracture after so many months in a sling --- so it can't fully straighten, and rotation has some limitations --- can't scratch my back with that hand ! And after a large area of anaesthesia / numbness across the arm, now just a small patch near the elbow where the skin has no feeling. So much for any plans to retire and become a great violinist !

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Lapdog. | 2006/07/15

Once again, let me explain some things to you. My husband has me on a budget. I used to earn my own money, almost right after matric. I'm not used to having so little money, I used to buy without checking prices. Now, no new clothes, no new jewelry, no new nothing. Just food, lunch. He provides petrol and groceries. I would give up EVERYTHING, no lunch, nothing else but dope. I had a real problem. Now my problem is coping without the dope. I don't want to start the whole thing all over. I MUST cope. Must keep my ass on the straight and narrow. Must . . .
I'm sorry for sort of exploding on you, not you, me. I just felt crap, still do. Maybe I should take up drinking. Must have some sort of distraction from life. Life sux. Can't be a good mother, a lousy wife and even lousier student. I'm feeling worthless at the moment, and extremely stupid. Was never smart, but now dumb, like my canary, courting himself in the many mirrors in his cage.
Dunno, perhaps you should practice the kill on me. See if you have the balls.

Reply to Lapdog.
Posted by: anon | 2006/07/15

Slayer thanks for replying. I have seen a neurologist, had the MRI of my cervical spine as he thought it was nerve entrapment, coming from my neck. My neck ok. He sent me to shoulder specialist, who diagnosed me with suprascapular tendonitis. Mine is a combination of shoulder and neck as my fingers go numb sometimes and ache, the pain goes down my arm.
I wish you a speedy recovery.

Reply to anon
Posted by: Lapdog. | 2006/07/15

The money doesn't all go to weed, most of it goes for petrol, I drive around while stoned. And we may be above avarage when it comes to wealth, but not rich. I don't like the tone of this reply, it's my choice if I want to be stupid. Mine! And if you don't understand my perfect world, don't make me the stupid one. At least I don't want to kill those people I don't like. If that was the case, many would have died by now.

Reply to Lapdog.
Posted by: slayer | 2006/07/15

But that's not true Lapdog could a human really survive without anything? How is that going to be possible? For some reason we need affirmations from others to make us feel good about ourselves and we need support. Just look at the support you get from your family. I cant believe you spend R2000 a month on weed. Im pissed off because I have nothing at the moment and I have never wasted money on weed. Weed is obviously just a way to help you cope by the sounds of things. Carry on with your shrink. I cant believe people like you who complain about money when you are stupid enough to spend R2000 a month on weed. You dont lack money, you lack thought! Sorry if that is offensive but it's true! It'slike these rich people on the Oprah show who are earninbg stacks more than my family yet they are so damn stupid that they are in debt! They cant control themselves enough to stop spending on things they dont even need. They spend it so they can get respect from other people probably with fancy clothes and cars and they suck! But anyways I hope you are well.


Anon I had my shoulder op last friday and the op was so rare the shoulder specialist doctor had never doe it before. He needed a neurosurgeon i with for the op to know what to do. I had suprascapular nerve entrapment. Which meant that about three muscles that hold the shoulder in it's place and help me push things were not turning on. Also they couldnt find a groove where the nerve should fall so they created a new one. Who knows whether there is groove for my right arm or not. haha
Anon what you should go see is a neurologist and he will test your muscles to see which ones are not woeking and then he can make a diagnosis from there. What cant you do with your arm? I couldnt externally rotate my left arm. My nerve will only come back to full use after 2-3 months. Oh dear! Good luck! If you need any help just ask for me on these boards and tell me how thngs are going okay?

Reply to slayer
Posted by: Lapdog. | 2006/07/15

Hi Slayer. The dope is a touchy subject for me. I have quit a week and a day ago, but need it bad sometimes. I love the stuff too much. And at the same time I hate it with a passion. It controls me. Literally. It tells me what to think (something I simply can't do on my own), it makes me feel superior (sp?) and it relaxes me, calms me down, while at the same time making me excited about, well, just about everything. I can analise, find answers and see the silliness in life. And life is fretty damn silly, as you say.
I actually don't want to stop, but must because I love enough. I care for my daughter and husband, and they are suffering.
And it costs alot of money, totalling perhaps even more than R 2,000 a month.
Money I'm not earning right now.
I don't know, you sound better to me today, sorry yesterday, I like that. In more ways than one, we think very much the same. I'm always thinking why, after more than 2000 years of existance, are we at this stage still? We should have been much more 'developed' by now. We should have no emotions, didn't need any money, and be totally self-maintained, so that every person can survive without having anyone or anything. That's the idea I have of the life we should be living by now.

Reply to Lapdog.
Posted by: anon | 2006/07/15

Hows your shoulder Slayer after your op? Did you have a spur that caused the impingement?

I've had a lot of pain in my shoulder going down my arm, the xray revealed a spur, at the moment trying rehab before the op. Wouldn't be able to cope without the use of my arm.

Reply to anon

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