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Question
Posted by: one nighter | 2004/10/11

Would he be interested

I had a one-night stand on Saturday after a drunking binge & not being out of a relationship for 8 months. I now feel very awkward (never done it before) and would actually like to know him better - I had never met him before.

I'm worried he wont be interested because he'll think I'm cheap and this is geniunely not the case. I'd like to invite him to lunch and at least talk about what happened. He hasnt phoned yet but sent a poem via sms on Sunday about what a nice person I am - yet he doesnt know at all to say that. Is he just being polite änd actually not interested? I'm sceptical to call him because I dont want to embarrass myself further and the fact that he was also coming on to other girls that night (hence I feel he just wanted someone to sleep with) - yet I'm still drawn to him.

I want to know what the guys would think of me if they were the guy. Do you consider one-night stands, just that or would you open the possibility of knowing that girl - regardless of the bad first impression.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

o.n, we can't guess what h's actually like, or how he actually feels ; even less than you can. This is one reason why one night stands are not a good idea. If you can get to know him better, you'll either discover that he is nice enough to consider a relationship with, or not nice enough, so you'll be well rid of him. Why not call and explore a possible lunch ? If he turns you down, then at least you know that this won't work out, and you can move on to other tings. If he accepts, you can explore a little further, and find out a bit more about each other.

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Our users say:
Posted by: lala | 2004/10/11

if he was intrested he would have called by now..so as shaun sais send him a reply and wait...but i hardly think guys would want to settle down with a "one nite stand" girl....sory girl

Reply to lala
Posted by: No-No | 2004/10/11

Ja nog 'n slet van Tibet

Reply to No-No
Posted by: Shaun | 2004/10/11

Hi ON,

Depending on the person it is with, sometimes we just want a one-night-stand to be just that.
If it was with someone I wanted to know better, then I would have thought by now that I disappointed you that you haven't yet given me a shout, or at least tried to contact me.
Drop little hints with mutual friends that you think he's really cute or something like that. & as Zebra says as well, send an sms & leave it at that...
He seems to have tried brealing the ice though, so respond, & wait.
I would say though that if you don't try you wouldn't know.
Also remember, as you said, he was also coming onto other girls, so be open to rejection, if it happens.

Break the ice with him, leave communication channels open so that you could build it up to a date.

Good luck, & I hope it turns out like you want it to.

Cheers,
Shaun

Reply to Shaun
Posted by: LIZ | 2004/10/11

OH NO YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW THIS GIRL HOW CAN YOU COMMENT ON SOMEONE YOU DON'T KNOW. One nighter you made a mistake, if he was interested he would have phoned.

Reply to LIZ
Posted by: Oh No! | 2004/10/11

Another slut????

Reply to Oh No!
Posted by: Zebra | 2004/10/11

Send him an sms telling him that he was also cute and that you enjoyed his company. Leave it at that and let things develop. Good luck.

Reply to Zebra

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