Our expert says:
So your wife is a problem drinker ( as well as a smoker ). That she drinks secretly and excessively, and behaves badly when she does, sounds very like alcoholism, though she would probably fiercely deny that.
Even the amount you suggest you try to keep her to is far in excess of the recommended healthy alcohol limits for a woman or man.
Next time she behaves so unreasonably in a public place, leave her for the police to deal with, and don't let her make false accusations against you. Maybe when she faces criminal charges of being drunk and disorderly in public ( and a breathalizer and blood test would prove that case ) she might srtart to take her excessive drinking seriously.
Maybe she's lying out of embarrassment when she says she doesn't remember what hapened, but excessive drinking can cause memory damage as part of general brain damage, and very drunk people often don't recall the previous night's events when they sober up, anyway. But it further suggests that he excess drinking is at a serious level. I wonder how well her liver is coping with all these insults.
Sadly, it's common for alcoholics to refuse to admit the situation they are creating, and to want to blame others. This is how they often drive away those who used to love them
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