Posted by: Rashida | 2009/03/04

when everything goes wrong

Pls don’ t judge me, I know I will just sound like I am complaining but I want to know what ppl out there do when things are going wrong to the left right and centre.

This is my life -

1. cannot afford my bond and cannot get buyer for the house.
2. unemployed 8 months now despite sending out CVs every day. Was retrenched last year
3. keep meeting manipulative men, to the extent that every man gets a no from me now. Its safer than making further mistakes. At some point tried to seek out well to do men and sleep with them in the hopes they might help pay my expenses. Met one - and couldn’ t go thru with it
4. am suffering shooting back pains, dizziness and shortness of breath since Monday
5. went to a govt hosp because my med aid was discontinued last year after I missed two premiums. Went to govt hosp sat 5 hours without being seen
6. went to ATM, balance of R87 proudly reflects
7. credit card long maxed out. I do not qualify for debt counselling as only employed ppl do. Cashed in my last policy last month. There is no money coming in now. Not a cent.
8. suffering ill effects of stress –  hair falling out, insomnia usually from 2am to 5am, poor digestion
9. I get a bit of money in my hand, say R30, and all I want to do is buy a drink. Its not enough for the bond, its not enough to pay water and elec, its not enough to see a doctor for the strange shooting pains, its not enough to buy the nutritious food I used to eat. Its enough to buy a drink with

Every day I wake up is another day to face a myriad of problems and probably be notified of a new one.

What do I do to stop from going mad? I feel I am losing my mind. I remind myself that I still have a car, though it is old and has not been serviced in a year. I also remind myself I am alive and though I am not well, I can still walk and get around. I remind myself of homeless ppl and those who didn’ t eat today. I see the ladies with the babies on their back at the lights and I remind myself that’ s not me.

So why do I still feel so utterly despondent. Everything that used to go right is going wrong and the worst part is I don’ t know when it will end.

What do other ppl do at these times?


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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

If your main problem is finanial, then you need good financial advice. Hiopefully your bank ought to be able to provide that. At a time when your basic and financial life is so complex, maybe it'd be wise to postpone meeting men and getting involved with them --- they may inded be more likely to add complications rather than solutions. Sory that the state of government hospitals has been deplorable for many years now, and no government seems sincerely interested in improving this --- persistence pays, though. Do NOT buy the drink --- R 30 WILL buy nutritious food, even if not expensive low quality junk food, and if you collect several of the R 30's, soon you have enough for the other things you actually need.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: sister | 2009/03/05

I have been there my darling but trust me when i say that there' s a light at the end of a tunnel.

I think you should try to find a tenant and with that money make arrangements with your bank
Have you applied for UIF? and what happened to your Retrenchment Package?
Apply for any kind of work - even Receptionist - am sure you' d take home R3000 - that' s better than R30 rands.

Times are hard my sister but just try. Another option is to sell everything and move back home with your parents if they are still alive.

Reply to sister
Posted by: Phew ! | 2009/03/05

I am really sad and sorry to read about your problems, but you know I just don' t know what to say to comfort you apart from saying that you have to decide to believe in yourself, and get out and actively look for a job, no matter how below your standard it might be. Once you have a foot in the door and you can prove yourself to be honest and realiable, something sadly missing in a huge section of our population, Government, Municipalities etc etc, you will be recognised for your worth. Remember, the Lord will never send you a trail that you cannot handle, it may be difficult and it may take time, but don' t lose hope, it will come right, but you have to actively work at it. Good luck and sorry once again.

Reply to Phew !
Posted by: D | 2009/03/05

Nowadays the best way to find a job is word of mouth and someone you know, and if you desperate anything else thats legal of course should be fine!My father I recalled worked for a company for 15 years(foreman/manager) and they retrenched him cos they were pulling out of SA due to apartheid, but he sucked in his pride, and waitered and his last job before becoming a state pensioner, was a barman at 60 years of age.

All I can say is take what you have and turn it around. Sell your car maybe, but if you gonna use the money on alcohol then dont! That money can last you a couple of months! I have used public transport basically all my life and perfectly happy.

Government hospitals: get a referral letter from any doc really, and most of all try to be there like 7am in the morning!

Can' t your family help you out and support you for a while till you get a job?

As for men...........don' t even go there until you have sorted your life out!

Everything we go through in life is for a reason, just reading your post today has probably affected many in different ways and you will fine that you probably not alone! Times are hard, and I can tell you all about my problems but this post is really about you and all I can say is have faith in yourself to be able to come out from this. Times like this make people so much stronger and be able to show their true character. In your post I an see that eventhough you are going through this you still have a head on your shoulders and that should be a start!

Dont give up and show yourself you can fight for who you are and who you want to be!

Reply to D
Posted by: Flower 1980 | 2009/03/05

Yezzzzzzzzz I think I have problems in my life, you look at other ppl and their are worst of than me. Its not not enough im in a legal battle with ppl living for free in my house and my whole pay is going towrds my bond. So im wrking for other ppl how depressing. But Sister as long as you can get Up every morning God still has hope for.We all go through trails and tribulations, but at the end it only makes us stronger.We all go through a journey in life and somewhere there must be and End.Not in our time but GOD

Reply to Flower 1980

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