Posted by: Cosira | 2008/08/19

What would you call it?

Hi, I need your help in trying to figure something out please.

There is this guy at my work place who I just cannot figure out. I’ m not sure what to make of the situation. He is a Manager of a Project in one dept, and is known to be a friendly person to everyone  I’ ve heard him greet just about everyone at work incl the cleaners.

The Problem is this  he always passes me by and looks the other way. There has been one or two incidents where he actually said hi to me, but that’ s just about it. Sometime when I bump into him I have no idea what to expect, as I have said hi to him sometimes never getting any response, not sure if those times he didn’ t hear me. I have bumped into him (physically) by accident and he’ s never even blinked, he will just walk away without saying anything. Is it because he really doesn’ t like me? We have never argued or anything, so I am not sure what is the problem. He looks at me when he sees me but never says anything and would be all nice to anyone within the vicinity.

This is really bothering me. I think I may be attracted to him and that is why it bothers me so much. Another problem is that we are of different races, but I fee there is a vibe between us. I could be wrong but I still can’ t understand his behavior.

It is driving me crazy seeing him everyday and not knowing what is on his mind.

Oh, another thing, his office is a floor up from mine, yet he will come all the way to my floor to make coffee and he always looks in my office when he passes by, and I mean always.

Please help me figure this out.


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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Have you calmly and pleasantly asked him about this ? Mention that you find it puzzling how he responds to you, when you notice how friendly and warm he is to everyone else, and when you like him, so far as you know him.
Now, as for being attracted to him --- why do you think you would feel any attraction towards someone who behaves like this towards you ? Does he maybe feel a different "vibe" and feel alarmed by your attention to him, or the way YOU behave when you see him ? Remember, at this stage, because you really don't know him, you are reacting to things you THINK about him,,not to the real him. Nobody can tell you what he's thinking, except he himself

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: lilly | 2008/08/19

talk to him.. any kind of small talk...
and take it from there.

you have to communicate with him to see what' s actually going on. guessing all the time is a real time-waster..

Reply to lilly
Posted by: suede | 2008/08/19

The best thing you can do is, when he passes your office just ask him to make you coffee and see the responce even though you know that you don' t need a coffee or tee just for a test. You' ll see he will be free to talk, try it girl is not too late for the shot.

Reply to suede
Posted by: Cosira | 2008/08/19


How can you tell if that is the case, I' m too nervous to even speak to him so there is no way of knowing for us unless he approaches me.

IS there anything I could look for as a sign.

Thanks for the info tho.

Reply to Cosira
Posted by: Ag | 2008/08/19

I think he likes you

Reply to Ag
Posted by: Cosira | 2008/08/19

Thank you both for your replies, the thing is, whenever I see him I totally loose myself, I get so nervous. My heart skips a beat. So, approaching him is not even an option as I wouldn' t even know what to say, don' t wanna make an-|-of myself, if you know what I mean.

IS there any other way of knowing without making a fool of myself or embarrassing myself in anyway?

This is really bothering me. Is I' m typing this, he walked past and again he looked in as he walked. I just can' t seem to get over this issue. I get excited when I see him bt nervous at the same time. And he makes sure that he comes down everyday even if it is to make coffee though they do have a kitchen upstairs.

IS there another way to know what the deal is here?

Reply to Cosira
Posted by: SR | 2008/08/19

Maybe you should approach him and ask him? I mean there is enough chemistry between the two of you, whether it is bad vibes or good vibes? people who normally get mixed messages tend to be totally surprised when confronting the other person and finding out the real take on things. Keep us posted.

Reply to SR
Posted by: Lolo | 2008/08/19

he is in love or Lust and can' t say it!

Reply to Lolo

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