advertisement
Question
Posted by: ?? | 2007/12/20

What would u do?

hi i guest i am becoming one of the single mother in this world and would like to get advises from you all.

my baby's father forgot his responsibility of fatherhood, we don't stay together i have my own place i stay with my LO and he hired a back room where her mother used to work, he earn 3x my salary but he give me stories when he has to buy goodies for the LO, last week he told me he can't buy cristmas clothes for LO because he has to buy for his sister's kids 2 of them lost their mother and 3 lost their father so this week he tells me he can't buy Groceries for his LO because he is running out of budget, my family don't believe in taking people to court for mantanance and i have adopted that form them.

he pays for crech fees every months and the LO is in his medical aid. with my salary i can only affrod my car, townhouse, and some grocer for me and LO.

Should i dumb this man because really it seem difficult for him to be a father?

How do sinle mothers cope?

Your opinion is very imporatnt to me, please help.

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

If the other children have a living parent. it is that parent's responsibility to care for them and their needs. Speak to the Maintenance Court, and let the court decide what amount of maintenance he must pay you each month for the child. And, as Hope* says, chat also on the Parenting Forum and get suport and advice from others in a similar situation,

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

7
Our users say:
Posted by: Hope* | 2007/12/20

I also wonder how single moms manage. I imagine this to be one of the toughest things to have to be. You can chat on the parenting forum to other moms for tips, they can be very helpful.

Reply to Hope*
Posted by: ?? | 2007/12/20

thanx for your comments and understanding!

i guess is time to learn being a single mother! but how to cope very well?

Reply to ??
Posted by: Hope* | 2007/12/20

If the other children still have a parent, then I think it is the responsibility of the children's parents to clothe them. It is unfair of him to not get anything for his own LO under the circumstances. It is also very compassionate of you to want him to help the other children and agree with you that they should all be treated fairly and really he is not treating his own LO fairly. It was very unfair of him to drop you with the burden of paying the bond on your own.

I wish you luck ?? and hope things get better.

Reply to Hope*
Posted by: ?? | 2007/12/20


i told him i don't want to see any children suffer but he must tread them all the same, he don't mind to hire expensive car to take groceries to them but he hesitate to buy some for hm felsh and blood, and if he can afford christmas clothes for other kids i do'nt mind even if he spend 200 for my LO's cristmas clothes.

Reply to ??
Posted by: ?? | 2007/12/20

yes hope*

the reason he stay there is because we had a house togethe and i was responsible for bond, rates and taxes, telephone and my car + petrol because i travelled 120km to work and he travelled 5 km to work and he was not making part of his bond payment at all so after a long fight i moved out and sold the house so he's been staying in that house without making any payments.

now he moved there temporarly as he is looking for his own place. im not sure he tell the truth about the sisters children because 2 still have the father and 3 still have the mother but they stay with his mom, because the father was not legaky married to the mother before she died. and for those 3 the mother is married to another man and don't wanr to stay with her them, that's why they are at his mom's.

Reply to ??
Posted by: Gill | 2007/12/20

Hope you are begin rather dismal !! I live by the firm saying that ’Charity begins at home” and while I do understand and feel sorry for the other children that he has to take care of , what kind of a father does it at the cost of his own biological children? That is just selfish of him !!!

Reply to Gill
Posted by: Hope* | 2007/12/20

If I understand correctly, you have a car, live in a townhouse and can buy groceries for yourself and LO.

He rents a back room, has the LO on medical aid, pays the creche. He is also responsible (in tradition?) to also support with clothing - 2 children who lost mother and 3 children who lost father. He earns 3 X your salary, but lives in a back room so that he can afford - med aid, creche, clothes for 5 children and he also has to survive.

Do I understand you correctly?

Reply to Hope*

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
advertisement