Our expert says:
Good grief, R 2500 per half hour ? And people complain that shrinks harge too much ?
Seriously, a liar is hard to treat. Even if he says he really wants to change - is that true ? Or yet another lie ? And very rarely is a liar motivated to want to change. Why should he, if it suits him to lie ?
I know this is not what you're direftly asking about, but do get legal advice, as your situation is legally pracarious, and you have a malicious HUSBAND ( if not properly divorced ) with a legal pal, able to make trouble whenever he wishes to do so. It is NEVER EVER wise to not turn up in court when a matter affecting you is being decided - this way the court heard only his point of view, without you being able to correct it. And if it really is YOUR house or flat this sort-of ex is living in, against your wishes, that is also an urgent legal matter - don't hesitate to put him out of it - with his talents he'll find a solution, but at least it won't be at your expense. Is it legally certain that you CANNOT do anything about the situation you find so unpleasant, or it it that you choose not to do anything, but reserve the right to kvetch about it ?
Again, if you are worrying about the money HE owes people, you need legal advice to either make sure you don't have to pay his debts, or at least to limit the damage. Don't let such things drift, or they will only get worse.
You need good legal advice, and the help of a counsellor to get the resolve to do what is needed to protect yourself. What you do NOT need is medication for anxiety that will sedate you and make you even less likely to act to protect yourself.
It is not your responsibility to sort out his life, find help for him, and get him fixed, nor is it even remotely possible for you to do so. Look after yourself. He clearly won't do that
And on your last point - if he is a routine liar, assume everything he says is false - you'll be right more often than not, and the results of guessing wrong will probably be less damaging.
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