Our expert says:
There are several points to your comments. Firstly, if you only feel attractive to him if he initiates sexual activity, I suggest that you discuss with him the importance of you knowing what else he does to show you this (it may be that he does things but you don't notice it), or that he realises the importance of telling you how he feels about you. With regards masturbation, if it's fine with you and your husband's belief system, then absolutely it's okay do. If you are wanting to do this in secret, however, I would encourage you to think about why this is and what it might mean for the relationship.
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