Posted by: Heartbroken | 2009/09/14

What now?

My daugther is 11 years old. The other day I find photos on my phone that she took of her vagina and send it 2 another boy in her class. I wanted to kill her. She is not a problem child and very shy. She actually was child of the month for August in her Grade.. What now? We talked 2 her but she said she doesn' t know why she did it, he asked for it and she took the photo' s and forward it to him. What must we do? Go to school or the parents of the boy? And will it be wise to take her to a psychologist? Maybe she was molested by somebody where she stayed when she was small. She only went to creche when she was 3 and a half years old? Please help??????

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Good grief ! Startling to think of, but then one thinks --- actually just using all too available technology to do what some kids have always done. OK, don't panic. Kids get curious, and explorations and play, of the "I'll show you mine if you show me yours" is really quite common and does no harm --- indeed sometimes the horrified reactions of parents and other adults may be more harmfuil than the events themselves. If you have reasons to be concerned that she MAY have been abused when younger, it would make sense to take her CALMLY to see a child psychiatrist or child pschologist for asessment, but the recent events are not a strong suggestion of prior abuse.

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Our users say:
Posted by: woman | 2009/09/14

Hi Heartbroken,

Sjoe, I don' t know what I would do if it were me, but CS does make sense. I agree that you should go to the boy' s parents though. And you should certainly work on your daughter' s ability to say no to boys. Luckily you got this early and you care enough to act.

Good luck to you!!

Reply to woman
Posted by: Heartbroken | 2009/09/14

Ok, fine, we did not think about that... that in our time there was no internet of cellphones... but our main concern is that the boy might forward the photo' s to other children and then somebody might run 2 the principal etc. So what do you think must we do? We thought maybe we must go the the boy' s parents and ask them 2 take the photo' s of his phone if it is still on the phone and then forget about the whole story?????? Or wait until something happens but then it might be 2 late?????

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