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Question
Posted by: Hurt | 2004/10/25

What is an affair?

Hi Doc and other readers. Please help me with this one. My boyfriend and I lived together for 8 months and things just were not going well for us. I treated him badly, the sex was bad and I did not make him feel needed or wanted. Anyway, beginning of the month he moved out. I also have not trusted him for a while, but he has never given me reason not to trust him. Anyway, the other day I decided to check sms's that he sent to people. Why, I dont know! Anyway, I found a whole lot of sms that he had sent to 2 girls. I confronted him about it and he said that he just needed a bit of excitement in his life, he didnt mean anything from it, she means nothing, he didnt sleep with her and it is over. It was just a flirtation. He loves me!. Now, do I believe him, try and forget and give our relationship another chance. Or do I call it quits, because how can I trust him every again? Please help.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I agree with Josh, frankly. after the way you admit to having treated him, it's no wonder that he looked elsewhere, even if only for some imaginary fun ; and you are not describing a viable long-term relationship.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Josh | 2004/10/25

You say you treated him badly, didn't give him good sex and never made him feel wanted. Now you are checking his sms's. Are you just plain stupid or what! If anyone is treated that way they will look for someone else. If he says he still loves you then treat him as such. How can you call it quits? He should have left you long ago!!

Reply to Josh
Posted by: Demon | 2004/10/25

caal it quits!!!! Not that what he did constitutes an affair maybe a flirtation but not more, but because you said it there are so many wrongs and all of them put together does not make a right!!! go on and get someone that can give you what you whant!!!!!!! Set him free and let him do the same!! Good luck!!

Reply to Demon

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