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Question
Posted by: sugar | 2003/03/08

what is a victim of rape

i would like to find out if a girl was raped how will she react after the rape and her reaction if she face the rapist again would she sit and smile and make joke or would she be terrified

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Our expert says:
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Sugar --- how does "a girl" react if you give her a box of chocolates ? If she loves chocolate she may be delighted ; if she knows she's overweight and is struggling to lose weight, she may be angry. So, there's really no such thing as "a girl", and people's reactions to such bad experiences vary quite widely, depending on the nature of the event, their previous experiences, their personality, and so on. Yes, she might be terrified ; or she might try to pretend she didn't recognize him, or, or, or --- there are many possibilities. We need to be cautious about over-generalizing or laying down laws about how people "ought" to behave, and look at each example in its own specific circumstances.

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Our users say:
Posted by: also | 2003/03/10

well ...I was raped at the age of 11
But I only saw the man who did it again late in my teens about 18-19y\o by accident in a public place...
and honestly I wanted to die or I wanted to kill him !!
I did not have a boyfriend until very late in High school I could not stand or trust men
however I am in a very stable, loving relationship now (23y\o) with a wonderful man
and i think Ive over come that but personally I could never handle seeing him again, and never
want too either
and I will still not be able to face him today....too much anger ,too much pain ..I was so young and inocent
and he didnt care!!

so .... but I guess every experiance differs!

Reply to also
Posted by: Ladylife | 2003/03/09

Sugar? Just as what each and every human being has very individual and unique finger prints so too can you TRY to define how any woman will react to being raped.

Will they be traumatised? The answer is a very definate YES, YES and YES again!

But human beings come from a very wide range of backgrounds, personalities and upbringings so how they will react to extreme trauma in their lives (which rape IS) and while some women will scream and shout - others will turn the horrors of this experience inwards and try to somehow 'deal' with it that way.

So there are NO hard and fast rules just how women will or even should react to the horrific and traumatic experience of rape suffice it to say that this lady will be traumatised and so much of her future handling and healing (possibly?) of the experience will depend on her own internal character and the professional help which should be there for her, after her rape experience which is nothing short of one person exhibiting extreme, deviant characteristics of trying to overpower and make a less strong and capable person his victim.

Ladylife

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