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Question
Posted by: Jules | 2005/12/12

What do you think of this

I am seeing my b/f for 8 months now and he's ex has still got a key for his house. His ex still wash her washing at his house. He has got full custody over his son and she stays in a batchelor flat and there is no "space" for a washing machine. We had so many fights over this. If she have a problem with something she calls him to come and fix it. I don't know to handle this situasion any more

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Our expert says:
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His ex doesnt sound like she's Ex enough --- and surely not Ex enough for you to be able to have a proper relatonship with him. CP Mom's suggestion of the lists sounds like a good one. His having custody of the child is no excuse for her to have keys to the home.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Jules | 2005/12/12

Thank you Cp mom. I am not going to take this anymore. I was thinking that I am just over sensitive and jelous but hearing this from you guys I am defnitaly going to take a stand.

Reply to Jules
Posted by: figured it out | 2005/12/12

Its a tough one, I will not be as tough as the others, though I can understand why they are. This does not sound normal, but does not have to mean its wrong.

Firstly, I dont think she should have keys to your home. It would make a difference if you were friends with her, and understood that their relationship is actually non-threatening, so it would be ok for her to accept help from him etc, expecially since there is a child involved. My brother has that sort of relationshipwith his ex, the mother of his child, though she does not have keys to the house. But thats a matter of choice.

I dont believe there is anything wrong with having a friendship with her, in fact I think its healthy. But if he is making excuses for her, and spending more time with her than he should, or giving her more attention than he should, maybe some compromise is needed.

And if she is using all these things as excuses or reasons to see him, then thats also a problem. As hard as this may be, just try get a better understanding of the relationship between them, andtake it from there.

One thing both he and this woman ought to understand and consider, is your relationship him, and the respect your relationship deserves. Its seems as if you are not getting the consideration and respect you deserve and are entitled to.

Reply to figured it out
Posted by: CP Mom | 2005/12/12

I just get soooo de moer in with chicks like this and also that WE must make the plan!

The damn GUY must pull his finger.....

Reply to CP Mom
Posted by: Blue Eyes | 2005/12/12

Good one CP Mom....I like that!!!

Reply to Blue Eyes
Posted by: CP Mom | 2005/12/12

1.) Change the locks on the house and keep one set and give him the other?
2.) Make a list of laundomats near her house as well as a machanic, plumber, electrician etc and mail or sms it to her.....

OR tell him to F-off!

Reply to CP Mom
Posted by: Blue Eyes | 2005/12/12

Get out!! Clearly he still wants to be involved in his ex's life and he wants her to be involved in his, if he was serious about your relationship and respected you, he would not run to her everytime she needs a "hand"...

Reply to Blue Eyes
Posted by: P | 2005/12/12

Jules, give space with his son, but this thing with the ex is a no no, is going to lead to problems, tell him quickly before people get into a comfortzone.

Reply to P

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