Posted by: M' s Dad | 2009/01/30

What am I to do with me?

My wife wants '  sole custody'  of our daughter, something I'  m very scared of, because she does everything and anything to keep me from seeing my baby. We'  ve been seperated since end July 08. I'  ve had to deal with some of the most ridiculous reasons. For example, she'  ll say I can'  t visit because they'  ve been invited somewhere for the day. I just have to live with it. Then, on the next occasion, she'  ll act all surprised about my request, then she'  ll try putting me on a guilt-trip that I only want to visit when I'  m bored and I'  ve never shown any interest in her daughter, etc. etc. etc. This obviously makes me angry and upset, she'  ll pick it up and say that she doesn'  t want me close to her daughter because I'  m a danger or threat. Now that we'  re eventually getting to divorce, she plans to use these same fantasies of her'  s against me. And the courts will probably sympathetic towards her, allowing me the minimum visitations.
This is obviously wrong of her. I'  ve thought about different outcomes to this case, but at the moment I feel that it'  s driving me insane, depro and "  gatvol"  . Changing her attitude towards me is impossible, but the rest of it is geniunely killing me slowly.

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Our expert says:
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Best take this matter to court, and have a court lay down rules for fair visitation rights for you, which your ex will not be allowed to ignore. A court must decide on what would be best for the child, and would not be sympathetic to one parent;s wish to be hurtful to the other or simply caprivious. You quote her of speaking of "her daughter" -- the child is not "Her" daughter, but a child with her own rights, who happens to be the daughter of her AND of you.
She can't simply claim that you are some sort of danger to the child without being able to subatantiate that. The courts have become more understanding of and sympathetic to, the father's rights, not automatically siding with the mother. Get a good lawyer if you can, to represent your needs and those of your child.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Zexeon | 2009/01/31

Who would know whats best for your child situation as I belief children are those that get hurt and feel they might be to blame for something that ain' t their fault. Best would be to try to reconcile with your wife and if you both did everything in your power to make it work and it still don' t and you going to go through with the divorce just agree that you both won' t use your child as a pawn between yourselfs .... If you really no thred to your child ect. there would be no reason why the court would withhold custody from you seeing that its in a childs intrest to have access to both parents........

Reply to Zexeon
Posted by: Soul | 2009/01/30

Fight for your daugher and don' t give up and fight for joint custody. I understand that all you going through is hard and it' s taking it' s toll on you and you still have a long way to go but it will get better. What you going through now won' t last forever and you' ll be gratefull at the end and you still have your daughter.
Your wife is being spitefull and selfish and she' s handeling this in a very ugly way. Her poor treatment towards you is not right, unfortunatley no one can change that only she.

Do you have a lawyer a good one to give you the best service and fight for you and your daughter?

Reply to Soul

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