Our expert says:
There can be so many reasons for being increasingly angry and irritable - the commonest would be stress and anxiety disorders, and depression.
But what you seem to be describing is an unhelpful and fruitless pattern of severe anger over things which have happened, long ago - which, in themselves, cannot be changed. You have no possibility of changing what actually happened. But you have complete freedom to decide and choose how you will continue to react to what happened.
SOME people did selfish things which you understandbaly found hurtful, years ago. You are still insisting on carrying the anger with you, though nothing benefits you or your children in any way, about doing this.
Anger Managament Classes are rubbish - our individual causes and natures are so different that it's nonsense to pretend that a chat given to dozens of people at the same time will make much difference. What WOULD help would be cognitive-Behaviour Therapy, CBT, which is excellent for changing ingrained bad habits of thought, and finding more fruitful ways of reacting to the past, freeing yourself to living much more happly in the future. SADAG should be able t help you find a CBT-competent shrink in your area.
What bad those people did to you in the past is not your fault - but it IS your choice to insist on carrying round a big suitcase full of anger, to burn yourself with every day. Discard it, and find the peace you deserve in a positive and confident way of life
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