Our expert says:
Interesting question. I have been forming the view that we Africans have been getting a bit to smug about "ubuntu" --- bragging about it, rather than actually practising it. Ofr assuming that it means that everyone else will be there to help and support people in need --- so we, personally, don't need to do anything.
What you are describing suggests that these folks were what the English call "Fair-Weather Friends" --- the sort of people who are appy to lend you an umbrella, so long as it isn't actually raining. When the weather is fine, and you need nothing --- they're there for you. But when it's cold and there's thunder and lightning, then they have something else, something better, to do.
I don't think you have been expecting too much from these "friends" --- I think they have been expecting far too little of themselves.
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