Posted by: jhbGuy | 2007/05/31

told me she was raped

i really dont think it would be fair to her to go into any details regarding this, and i do understand that this makes your job more difficult but i feel i must maintain the confidentiality... a good "friend" of mine told me she was raped... she has not told me any details but i have been intimate with her and therefore am also worried for my own health. what is the best way to approach this situation? should i try to discuss it with her or should i let her tell me in her own time? if you know of any related web sites where i may be able to find some extra info that would also be apprecited and if there are other people who use this forum and may of been in a similar situation please let me know how u dealt with it...

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Our expert says:
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if you are concerned about STI's or HIV then you can go to your family doctor and be tested. This way you do not have to ask your friend difficult questions about her own status.

For information on how to be of help to someone who has been raped Rape Crisis are an organisation based in CT who will be able to assist. Their website is

Best wishes

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Hlux | 2007/06/01

If you've been intimate with her then there must be some form of trust that you have with her. I think you should sit her down and talk to her about the situation. Make sure to not think of yourself first as that will push her away. If she could open up to you about being raped then, she'll open up to you more. Don't push her to tell you and don't push her away either for telling you. Go together to the clinic to get tested. I know I'm saying all the don'ts here. Just you might not know how she will re-act, she might go into a depression or do something drastic and that no one wants. Once she has opened up to you and you both have been tested. Seek counselling from either a close relative or friend that knows how to help. This girl she must not bottle all her emotions up cause, that won't help her at all. You on the other hand will have to make the decision to either help her through this no matter the results you got from the clinic or to let her know that you can't help her through it. Just make sure she is surrounded by people that love her and can help her.

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