Our expert says:
I'm sure everyone, including Liza, fully recognizes how awful it feels when a friend seems to be starting to self-destruct and you can't find any way to be as helpful as you would want to be. I think what she was responding to, which is well worth your while considering rather than taking too much offense at, was the feeling your message created that you were almost more upset that your friend was trusting and listening to someone else rather than you, when it should probably have been pleasing that at least she was listening to anyone not actively harmful to her, and it would have been more useful to think about how to work with this other person to persuade your friend to get the help she so obviously needs.
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