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Posted by: just dont know - URGENT PLS | 2004/11/02

to Kernel, shaun, other wise ones

dear kernel

Could you kindly help with some words of advice. I have a problem.
Now i dont know if I have communication problems or what exactly it is.
Lately I have been dealing with allot of things like spiritual healing, finding myself, getting rid of "friends", like clearing out my cupboards or something to that effect.
Now this is the thing - there is one friend who means the world to me.
Things were rocky after a fight we had. I wnat to sort things out but am no sure if it's worth it.
I really care for this person - and to be honest I am dissappointed in the both of us -we did not make enough of an effort to heal our friendship - it hurts me tremendously.
We have shared so much - I do not want to become a distant memory. My life is happy buyt somehow there is always that "something" missing.
Pls help.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Shaun | 2004/11/03

Hi Guys,

Thank you for your compliments, but I really don't think I'm wise at all. I'm just a normal guy like most other people around.

Never-the-less, I do agree with Kernel here. Just go out & be determined to make the first move. Sometimes that's the hardest thing to do, & may be your only hurdle in your endeavour.

You do say you care a lot for this person & you really wouldn't want to lose the friendship & bond you have previously shared. So please don't let this hold you back any longer. Don't even take into consideration who it was that didn't make enough of an effort to try recover what your'll had. Just try let be bygones be just that & look ahead.

Mind you, please make sure that you keep your hopes up on receiving a warm welcome but don't have any expectations at all. This person may still hold a grudge, or just be holding something against you, or maybe just still upset with you. Don't allow this to side-track you from your intention to recover an obviously good friend that you had in your life. That I feel should be your goal here. No matter who blames who, or who is still upset with who, intially just try recover the communication then resolve to work on the other aspects if this is what the situation calls for. Otherwise, just agree together to let it be & allow yoursleves to work on your friendship again. I feel certain that if you guys work through this, you will have a much stronger frienship.

I urger you to not leave this any longer & resolve to make the first approach. & remember, what ever happens, don't hold this against the other.

Good luck, I do wish you are able to work things out as it seems like this is a very dear person to you.

Cheers,
Shaun

Reply to Shaun
Posted by: Kernel | 2004/11/03

Seems like both of you are too stubborn to make the first move.

If you really value this friendship you will have to make the first move. Make an appointment to meet somewhere and then discuss your issues with your friend. Maybe there is a misunderstanding somewhere which could actually be a very minor issue, but it needs to be resolved.

You have nothing to lose by setting up this meeting, but if you don't you will never know.

Reply to Kernel
Posted by: just dont know | 2004/11/02

Hi Samantha
believe me - my faith in God and my relationship with God might not be what it should be but me and the big guy are working on things.
I miss my friend and nothing seems the same.
I want my friend back.

Reply to just dont know
Posted by: Samantha | 2004/11/02

Dearest Friend

I don't see myself as I wise person but I can surely relate to the statement of " there is always that something missing".
I wrote the exact words to one of my closest friends and guess what here answer was. " That something Sam, is God"

I have been baptized last Sunday and my life is now complete. I still have my ups and downs, but with God by my side I ready to face them.

I will keep you in my prayers
God bless

Reply to Samantha

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