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Question
Posted by: montle | 2008/01/02

to foxybrown, ntle and others

thanks for the advice wrt to the DRC guy. me and this guy met and discussed issues openly.
1. he had his papers done legally and sometime this year he will receive his citizen ship status,
2. the ex girlfrind stay in zambia and they parted in 1999.
3. i also explained to him my religion and i was upfront that there will be no sex until we are marriied.

on the 21 dec 2007 things went bad. he were going to the shops and on the way he suggested that we must have sex and we must go back to his office to do it. i refused and he was very angry and dropped me at the shopping mall and left. i then called him several times on saturday - 22 dec and there was not answer. on sunday i tried again and he answered: saying he is busy and will return my call, but he never did.

he then left for drc on the 24 dec for holidays and but i called him an hour before he left and he aswered the fone because i was calling from a public fone. do you think he is avoiding me because of the sex issue?

i love him very much and i thought he was my soulmate. he is coming back to work next week and im not sure what to do? maybe i must just leave him alone, is he wants to talk he will approach me.

this is really stressing me, he was talking about lobola and having me as his wife and now he is acting strange.

or maybe on the 1st day when we met, he said i must call me when i need transport and this was an offer in exchange for sex.

please advice

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Our expert says:
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However much you want it to be otherwise, this is NOT the behaviour of a loving man nor of a man who deserves your love.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Ntle | 2008/01/02

Somehow i had to go browse back to check your answer to my question and i was shocked to find out you were one of Jehovah's witnesses.
it is not Religion that forbids marrying an outsider but the word of God (the Bible).it is actually Jehovah who is against that is'nt montle?
So if it Him and you go against his word what are you hoping for? who are you testing Satan himself? because here is clear he is not testing you montle.
i know Jehovah 's witnesses as people who try harder to remain chaste in this immoral world Please pray hard

Reply to Ntle
Posted by: Ntle | 2008/01/02

Sleep with this man and loose your dignity and sanity that is all
he want from you.he is far from being a soulmate ,he is giving you signs but you are so blind to see.
He noticed that you are after him that is why he is avoiding you blah blah if he was a man enough he was going to houner your wishes of no sex before marriage not ask you to do it in his office .that is an insult only sluts can be treated that way.
as for girlfriend in 1999 please open your eyes there no such things stop trusting this man ok?

Reply to Ntle
Posted by: tsholo | 2008/01/02

U're right not to let yourself be pressured into something u don't wanna do. He's being very childish & unfair, stop calling him. I'd advise u not to sit and mope, wondering if he'll come back, get on with yo life.
U'll get through this & IF he ever decides to contact u when he does come back make it clear how u feel about his sulking & don't give in even though u're not comfortable just so u can keep him around.

Reply to tsholo

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