Posted by: frightened | 2008/08/26

to cybershrink. thank you (post 1972)

thx for the response. I am such a wreck right now.I was abused by my stepfather for years and my mom always covered it up. The last thing I want is for my daughter not be protected by me.
I wll follow up with a visit to social worker because even if there isn' t sexual abuse the situation is unhealthy with my family and my kids.Thx once again for your time

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I can see how your own experiences make the situation far more fraught for you --- you will feel anxious not to overlook such possible risks to your daughter, and want to protect her, yet obviously would also not want to be over-sensitive, as there's the opposite risk that children can be harmed by excessive protection and alarm where it might not be altogether appropriate. And if it seems that nothing particularly nasty has actually occurred, the social worker could help you to calmly *( which is always more effective !) discuss your unease with him so he can understand why you feel this way, and seek to mend his ways even if the offense might have been unintentional or unthinking --- he can become more "thinking" about such matters

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