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Posted by: Lathi | 2004/11/18

threatened at work

I asked for a day off from our Company manager and asked him not to take it from my annual leave and treat it as a special leave and he said it's fine, today my senior (senior secretary) i'm a junior secretary, my desk is in front, so she came in and told she is very cross with me how dare i report to the manager not her because she is the one who's supposed to ask a pemission for me ku boss and next time I do that she take me to a hearing and i'll be fired and by the way the day that i asked for from my manager will be taken from my annual leave which is the reason why i did not bother asking her because i knew she will take it from my annual leave and I've only got5 days left now. and i'm using my leave to write exams as they say I dont have a study leave. what should I do as this is not the first time she threatens me, when ever i do something she doesnt like she threatens me.

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Our expert says:
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Sounds like a hysterically excessive response from the senior secretary. She must surely know that nobody could EVER be saked for speaking to their boss, and not going subserviently through her. Maybe events in the office have made her feel very insecure about her own position and authority, so she has over-reacted to this very much smaller issue ? Is there an HR Dept with which you can discuss her apparently frequent and inappropriate threats ? As Demon says, maybe you could or should register a grievance report against her, to at least have it on record that she is threatening you over inappropriate issues.

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Our users say:
Posted by: P'SNUMBERONESUPPORTER! | 2004/11/19

AG SHAME POOR P, TRUTH HURTS NHE. YOU CAN SPEAK AFRIKAANS TIL IT COMES OUT OF YOUR EARS IF IT EASES YOUR PAIN, HOWEVER YOU CAN'T CHANGE THE FACT THAT THINGS HAVE CERTAINLY CHANGED WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT. POOR YOU, YOU SEEM TO BE BEARING A WHOLE LOT OF HATRED PITY IT DOES NOT MAKE ANY OF US SLEEP LESS AT NIGHT, INSTEAD YOU'RE THE ONE HAVING SO MUCH NEGATIVE ENERGY SO MUCH THAT YOU THINK YOU 'ILLUSIONS' WILL HAPPEN ONE DAY. TELL YOU WHAT, I SUGGEST YOU CLOSE YOU EYES AND COUNT SLOWLY TO TEN, MAYBE JUST MAYBE WHEN YOU OPEN YOU WILL BE LIVING IN THE EARLY EIGHTIES (OR BACK) ONCE AGAIN. POOR MAN, YOU NEED HELP AS YOU ARE HAZARDOUS TO YOUR OWN SELF TO START WITH! AM THE ONLY DARKIE IN A DEPT OF 24 OTHER WHITE PEOPLE, GUESS WHAT WE GET ALONG JUST FINE, I RESPECT THEM AND SO DO THEY WHEN IT COMES TO ME. BY THE WAY PLEASE DO REPLY IN AFRIKAANS, GUESS WHAT I WON'T UNDERSTAND A WORD OF YOUR SORRY EXCUSES FOR AN OPINION. LOVE YOU TOO DEAR.

Reply to P'SNUMBERONESUPPORTER!
Posted by: Paul | 2004/11/19

Zama your mentality is just as f#$up as p's do you think the country is being run well? Look at the shit our depute president is in, do you still feel lekker when paying tax knowing what you know.

-|- it stop this shit now!

Reply to Paul
Posted by: Cassie | 2004/11/19

Your are a bad as the guy who started with all this, where does "WE RULE THE COUNRTY, YOU LISTEN OT US>>LIVE WITH IT" help anybody, you are being a narrow minded dumb racist just like he is.

Reply to Cassie
Posted by: Onlooker | 2004/11/19

P - i dont blame your wife for leaving you , you sound like a real miserable old assh****!!

Reply to Onlooker
Posted by: Kurhula | 2004/11/19

P
Jy is baie dom, dit is mense wat soos jy dink wat nerens gaan in lewe. Ek weet jy het nie die kwalifikasie wat nodig is om die werk wat jy doen te doen. Jou vel het vir jou gepraat, daardie tyd is verby, gaan leer en maak iets van jou lewe. Jy kan maar oranje toe gaan bly, ons gee nie om nie. Moenie vergeet dat dit was Lahti se ouma wat jou groot gemaak, jy is onnosil.
As jy niks goed om te se, shut up. Laat die mense wat kan help antwoord. Jy sal ook eendag hulp nodig. Jy is nie superman.

Reply to Kurhula
Posted by: P | 2004/11/19

Since you don't seem to understand, I did not give advice, I wasn't interested in giving her advice.

You're not ruling the country, you're buggering it up like all other countries in Africa. What do you think will happen if (hypothetically) the whites all went to a barren peace of land somewhere and build it up from nothing and left you behind? 10 years later there would be a infra structure, and what will you do? You'll be sitting here with everything around you in tatters and lamenting the fact that the whites are (unfairly) in a better postion, and you would all want to go there -and the cycle will start all over again. Show me one positive creation on earth where you were involved.

Reply to P
Posted by: P | 2004/11/19

:) Duidelik het iemand anderste bogaande in Engels geskryf het, kan raai wie.

Reply to P
Posted by: Zama | 2004/11/19

To P

Its so sad to come across small narrow-minded, dumb, racists like you in this day in life..I wish you could just wake up and smell the coffee. We do understand your rights to speak your preferred language but I think if you giving advice you should speak English so that everyone understand or just dont respond.
Last but not least P: Your racist days are gone and am afraid there's absolutely nothing you can do except being as sour & rude as you are!!!!!!!! WE RULE THE COUNRTY, YOU LISTEN OT US>>LIVE WITH IT

Reply to Zama
Posted by: P | 2004/11/19

Guys I really want to apologise, the thing is I'm going through a terrible time. When i read Lathi's post I felt that she does not have a problem compared to what I'm going through,
please forgive me, My wife just left me for another bastard.

Reply to P
Posted by: P | 2004/11/19

Jy bevestig wat 3/4 van die naiwe blankes in hierdie land nie wil insien nie, nie voor hul eie families eers verkrag/vermoor/beroof word nie.

Reply to P
Posted by: brown dash | 2004/11/19

P

Daar is niks verkeerd met ons land P. Die sake is reg .
Van die AK47 - I better leave that to your own imagination.
Ak47 is a man's best friend!

Reply to brown dash
Posted by: P | 2004/11/19

ak47 verduidelik waarmee ons te doen het, en waar die probleem lê in die land.

Reply to P
Posted by: Lathi | 2004/11/19

bantu bakuthi anicingi ukuba unengxaki lomntu ufuna uncedo, ukuba ebengena ngxaki ngeyengenje kuba ndiqinisekile baninzi abantu abathetha olulwimi lwakhe abaphendula nge english ukuze wonke umntu ave, phofu indlela aqine ngayo asoze avume uba unengxaki.oh ndisizela abantu bakuthi abamnyama abasebenza naye.

Reply to Lathi
Posted by: Brown dash | 2004/11/19

P , uyinja ! Ungababantu ingaske ndiba nqunqe nge AK47 xa ndibabona !

Reply to Brown dash
Posted by: P | 2004/11/19

Ek het gedink jy is verkeerd en het dit gesê.

Ek het jou nie ge-adviseer nie en ek stel nie belang om jou te adviseer nie.

Skryf in jou eie taal, dan is dit in elk geval makliker om jou te ignoreer van die begin af.

Reply to P
Posted by: Lathi | 2004/11/19

Thank you people for your advice, I will speak with her next week when i've cooled down. and P thanx for nothing, wena uyalwazi ulwimi endilithethayo, come to think of it if we were all to write in our languages do you think that will be any good, I dont think so, so please P stop being a rude & racist. me and my afican brothers and sisters we also dont have a problem expressing ourselves in our african languages its just we want everyone to underatand what we are saying, why bother giving advice to someone who does not understand a word on what you are saying, worst of all I ask you nicely and politely but no you still do the same, you won't get anywhere with that attitude sibhanxa esikwrada rha ucinga ungubani.

Reply to Lathi
Posted by: P | 2004/11/19

Paul Jammer ons moet baklei oor so iets, as dit eksamenverlof was, dan vra ek om verskoning, afgesien daarvan dat sy blykbaar oor die kop van haar toesighouer gegaan het, maar soos ek dit sien wil sy die 5 dae wat sy oor het reserveer vir eksamen verlof en wou daarom nie die enkel dag wat sy gevat het vir iets anders as gewone verlof laat tel nie.

Paul Ek het op 1 spesifieke konferensie gesit wat oor bedrog (fraud) gegaan het en na almal voorgetjommel het en hul mening gelug het steek een sy hand op en sê: As almal met die heilige gees gevul is sal hul van nature reg optree en sal al die mensgemaakte wette onnodig wees. Ek gaan sit toe etenstyd by hom en gesels met hom, hy is saam met Tutu destyds as jong kind uit die land gevat en skoolopleiding in Engeland gehad, hy was voorheen op ministereriele vlak by een van ons buurstate, lekker lewe gelei, rondgejol ens en toe tot bekering gekom: Ek vra toe vir hom, wat van jou voorvaderlike geeste, die tokkollosie, sit jy jou bed nog op bakstene ens ? Hy sê toe(wat ek weet) as jy wedergebore is en geesvervuld is, dan sterwe jy hierdie ander dinge af. Sy oe was sag en met liefde vervul. Paul, dink jy ons het worries in die land as almal so is? Nee! Klink dit of ek probleme het om met hul te meng as almal so is. Daar is baie gemors onder die blankes, maar dit sal mens kan uitsort en beheer. Ek het jare gelede MBA gedoen en een van die groepslewe was 'n jong swarte. Ek stap anderdag die straat af en hy kom afgery en stop sy Astra byna in die middel van die pad, spring uit en groet my met die hand. Hy was nie 'n barbaar nie en daarom het ek hom destyds nie soos een hanteer nie, maar sulke gevalle is ongelukkig in die minderheid.

My horisonne is ok.

Reply to P
Posted by: Paul | 2004/11/19

P broer ek self is 'n staunch gebore afrikaner, maar jy is so behep met blinde woede en rasse haat dat jy nie kan sien die girl will die dag he om 'n eksamen te gaan skryf nie. Dit staan net so in haar oorpronklike skrywe geskryf. Ek stem saam met jou daar is sekere elemente wat nogsteeds dink die wit mense is alles gegee en ook verwag dat daar vir hulle net gegee word. besef nie ons voorouers moes ook werk vir wat hulle gehad het nie. Maar sy is nie een van hulle nie. Lig bietjie die apartheid mentaliteit, verbreed jou horisonne en jy sal sien dat dinge rerig nie so bad is nie. Eh?

Reply to Paul
Posted by: P | 2004/11/19

S Jy stel ou kontroles voor wat vir baie jare by baie instansies werk. Dis nie wat gehoor wil word nie, die punt is, bogenoemde verwag dat sy spesiaal behandel moet word, daar moenie van haar verwag word om van haar gewone verlof prys te gee omrede sy 'n dag wil af he nie, dis hierdie mentaliteit wat SA onderkry op alle fronte, alles moet verniet gegee word, dit is aan hulle verskuldig, die wereld skuld hulle alles. Daar word oral bakhand gestaan en skaamteloos gebedel en oorgeneem op alle terreine, geen norme of etiek tel punte nie.

Reply to P
Posted by: Paul | 2004/11/19

Nope the formal diciplinary is just another gimmick for HR to cover up issues before it gets to the big gahoonies at the CCMA. Once this bitch told me to go F#$k myself in the kitchen and I went straight to the CCMA, its amazing how quickly HR sorted her out when the got that call.

Reply to Paul
Posted by: S | 2004/11/19

Hi Lathi

I understand your complexity but maybe you should consider the informal phase first: talk to her and tell her how you feel, if that does not work well then comfront your manager, there might also be a need to call the two of you together and resolve the conflict. A formal grievance should be the last phase of handling the situation. Remember to revise your conditions of service(particularly leave) at hand to assist you procedurally. Maybe in future you will need to sit together and plan for your leave accordingly to avoid conflict, you may also concider establishing a system to control half days at your workplace, eg. a form you will complete with the hours took everytime you take a half day and if the hours work up to 8 days in time, then make it a full day which will then constitute leave.This will also protect you in terms of compensation for injuries on duty(between those hours at which you'll be off work) and it will be kept in your file as proof and ofcourse the half day form would be endorsed/approved by your senior/manager

Good Luck

Reply to S
Posted by: P | 2004/11/18

Paris, vee dit uit jou oe uit en gaan beledig jou vriende.

Sy het die dag vir iets persoonliks gebruik; want sy het net 5 dae oor wat sy vir eksamens WIL gebruik

"and I've only got5 days left now. and i'm using my leave to write exams"

Angie, jy weet nie eers waaroor dit gaan nie, kruip in hul gatte in en mag ons van jou lees as hul jou verkrag/ jou huis besteel/jou familie beroof.

Reply to P
Posted by: Angie | 2004/11/18

I agree with Paris,
P, if you have nothing constructive to say then dont! Whether Lathi speaks Afrikaans or not is nobody's business and quiet frankly she does not have to know the language. How many african languages to you know?

I hope Aa and HAHAHA are swearing at you idot in their languages! Stay off this forum because you're rude, dispicable and distructive!

Reply to Angie
Posted by: PARIS | 2004/11/18

P from my very limited afrikaans vocabulary ''Jy praat Kak''

She clearly stated that she needed the days leave for writing exams. And she politely asked you if you could give you advise in english. Hey, im english (schooled in SA all my life) and still struggle reading the afrikaans language.

Dont be such a racist. Its people like you that we dont want in this country. Because you drag the rest of us down with your narrowminded rasist comments. GET A FRIKKIN LIFE!!!

PARIS
XXX

Reply to PARIS
Posted by: P | 2004/11/18

J Siekte/ongeluk: Teen die spoed van transformasie is die kanse goed dat daar binnekort in elk geval omtrent geen blankes in enige poste oor sal wees nie.

Dit is in elk geval van die punt af, jy het oorspronklik gepraat van advies gee.

In elk geval, jy kan nie eers in ABSA inloop sonder dat een van hulle die vermetelheid het om vir jou te se om dit wat jy vra in engels te herhaal nie.

Reply to P
Posted by: J | 2004/11/18

P- Jy mag dink dat jy so "high and mighty" is in jou wit vel en dat jy nooit "hulle" advies nodig sal he nie. Maar wat sou gebeur die dag wanneer jy dalk so siek is of in 'n ongeluk betrokke is (hoop maar dit gebeur nie) en daar geen "witmens" is om jou te help nie?
Just a thought...

Reply to J
Posted by: P | 2004/11/18

Paul Daar is geen indikasie waarvoor sy die verlof wou he nie, dit kon netsowel vir 'n gewone dag verlof gewees het. Sy se reguit sy het net 5 dae oor en sy was nie van plan om daarvan op te offer nie. As elke een maak soos hy/sy goed dunk en dinge rasionaliseer, dan is die land in chaos, dit is reeds vinnig oppad soontoe met die klomp in beheer

Reply to P
Posted by: aa | 2004/11/18

To P,

Apologies to the rest for being rude...

"Hambowa" sidenge ndini!!

Reply to aa
Posted by: P | 2004/11/18

J Watse advies dink jy wil ek he van hulle?

Reply to P
Posted by: Paul | 2004/11/18

Crap with this. According to the L R A every single permanent employee is entitled to the following leave : annual, sick, maternity (if you preggies), compassionate and study leave. The catch with study leave is that you cant ask for it if you writing a cooking exam and working for an IT company. Must be related to your job. I would lodge a grievance with H R against her, and the grounds for that would be constructive dismissal (her telling you shell drag you to a hearing and fire you can be construed as constructive dismissal). If you have a witness to this, take her to the cleaners. If not just tell her if she ever talk to you like that you will skip HR and go straight to the C C M A for constuctive dismissal. If she asks you what it is tell her to read it up.

f#k I get cross at things like this.

Reply to Paul
Posted by: J | 2004/11/18

Hi Lathi

P- Dit was regtig nie nodig nie , die dame het glad nie vir jou rasistiese opmerkings gevra nie. Let wel, sy het vir advies gevra. Ek wonder hoe jy sou voel as iemand jou in een van die ander nege tale moes advies gee!
Lathi- dont even bother to ask for a translation of P's message, as it does not seem to be friutful at all !!!

Reply to J
Posted by: P | 2004/11/18

HS Natuurlik is ek ge-irriteerd deur die nuwe suid afrikaners se mentaliteit wat alles volgens hulle maniere wil he en gedoen kry, die land is in sy moer in met hulle aan die stuur.

Reply to P
Posted by: HAHAHA | 2004/11/18

P

Ubuya kuphi? sibala nge English ukuze wonk' umuntu azwisise wena se uyayimosha lento.Ake uzane hle.

Reply to HAHAHA
Posted by: HS | 2004/11/18

P, don't go being a p... now. You sound very angry. Don't take it out on someone who needs advice, please.

So, in the spirit of helpfulness, you asked for a special concession to be made for you, if your boss did not like it, he would;ve said no.
Maybe your senior secretary does not have the 'authority' to make that call.
Nobody has a right to make you feel uncomfortable in your office environment. I would say that it sounds to me like she is jealous of you in some way. If she gets anymore intimidating, I would seriously advise you go to her superior and take her on.
Good luck with your work, your message is no-one pushes you around. No matter what position.
Go well...!!

Reply to HS
Posted by: Jackie | 2004/11/18

I agree with Kernal, if she has a problem she has to speak to you in a VERY professional manner. Stand up for youself even if she is the senior secretary. Tell her you will respect her as yoru boss but she also needs to repect you as a person.

Reply to Jackie
Posted by: P | 2004/11/18

Jy sal dit nie wil verstaan nie. Imenad wat slapgattig is en gebrainwash is en jammer voel dat Afrikaansprekendes lewe sal dit wel vertaal

Reply to P
Posted by: Lathi | 2004/11/18

thanx for your response

P could you please reply in English, I'm sorry but I dont understand afrikaans and I need to hear your advice.
Thanx

Reply to Lathi
Posted by: P | 2004/11/18

Soos Kernel gese het, jy het sekerlik volgens die beleid nie reg gehad om spesiale verlof te gekry het nie, dit moes seker gewone verlof gewees het, en jy het dit geweet en tipies nuwe Suid Afrika, gevoel jy is nie bereid om gewone verlof in te sit nie. En vermetel genoeg gewees het om oor die kop van jou toesighouer te gaan.

Klink nou wel vor ons of jou soesighouer kras is, maar as ek kyk na jou houding: Jy het geweet sy gaan dit van jou gewone verlof afvat (dit is die reels) en omrede JY dink dit moet nie so wees nie omrede jy net 5 dae oor het, het jy besluit dis 'n simpel stelsel en bogger jou toesoghouer in elk geval. Ek kan verstaan dat sy gatvol is vir jou houding en dat jy nie na haar luister nie en oor haar kop gaan, duidelik het jy in die verlede haar ondermyn, mag sy jou goed opdraende gee, jy het 'n tipiese nuwe SA houding waar al die reels gebuig moet word om jou te pas.

Reply to P
Posted by: Tori | 2004/11/18

I'd take it to the HR Department.

Reply to Tori
Posted by: 101 | 2004/11/18

Talk to her senior,

Reply to 101
Posted by: Kernel | 2004/11/18

The question is - were you entitled to special leave. What does your conditions of employment say?

I can understand her being mad at you if you have tried to jippo the system and also because you have jumped over her head, thereby undermining her authority.

She is wrong in threatening you and should handle the situation in a professional manner. She can only give you warnings, but only if it is valid and work related.

Reply to Kernel
Posted by: CuteOne | 2004/11/18

She's got serious issues lo mfazi, I take it it's a woman coz no man would act like this I assume. I'd say tell her you do not appreciate being threatened and tell her you're going back to the boss to lay a grievance. She has no right to threaten you because of her insecurities. good luck

Reply to CuteOne
Posted by: DEMON | 2004/11/18

PUT IN A GREVIANCE AGAINST HER

Reply to DEMON

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