Posted by: Claire | 2012/12/10

The Right THing to Do

My Teenage child is visiting a relative. They apparently had a heart to heart and my child said some things. The relative contacted my Husband to tell him this but never said what my child had said and he seemingly didn''t ask. At the time of the chat my child was very emotional as she lost her beloved pet. Not sure what is the right thing to do now. My child is onlt due home in a week. Should I call her and ask her? Should I call the reletaive and ask her (This person does tend to be person that meddles in other''s business)? I unfortunately can''y have a face conversation as they live far away. Or do I wait for my child to come home and have a face to face conversatio? In tte meanwhile it''s eating at me to know whats going on.

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Our expert says:
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I find this hard to believe. The child "said ome things" which apparently bothered the relative, but though they phoned your husband tyhey didn't actually tell him what the child had said ? And he didn't think to ask ? Not credible ! That'd be idiotic.
Maybe the child was upset and angry, and maybe she said something unpleasant about you - and maybe your husband felt embarrassed to tell you what it was she said ?
SO start by having a calm discussion with your husband. He MUST have been told more than he has so far chosen to tell you, and owes you a proper explanation. He is also in the best position to call the relative and find out more. Its possible the crisis, whatever it was, hae by now blown over.
On your side, you'd probably do best to wait for a calm chat with your child when she returns home.

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