Posted by: Ness | 2007/04/02

That uneasy feeling

I am feeling so uneasy today. My ex is returning from his trip (he sms yesterday asking if he could buy me anything - which of course pissed off Steven)

I've felt so relaxed since he left and really enjoyed myself but now that he is returning..... This man has such a hold over me...!!!

I can't seem to relax and my leg keeps on shaking (is that a panic attack)?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

He can't have any hold over you which you don't give him. So withdraw the holding provilege. Ignore his SMS and calls, and if he copntacts you directly just tell him it was grand while it lasted, but nmow it's over and you are moving on. And no, not a panic atack, just some anxiety

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Our users say:
Posted by: Ness | 2007/04/02

John you are such a card. OK OK I'll marry

Reply to Ness
Posted by: John | 2007/04/02

Ness, if I may, it would appear that there is a lack of finality about your break-up. If your ex has the relaxed familiarity of wanting to be a bearer of gifts, then surely he thinks that (a) your relationship allows this wholesale swapping of gifts or (b) he is insensitive enough not to be concerned with either how you feel or how Steven might feel.

Being on friendly terms with ex's is hardly ideal. Too many lines are blurred and too much is taken for granted. There is no sense of having to earn a liberty or having to graft for rights.

As for your leg doing a passable imitation of a leaf in a high wind, I would suggest that the cure is deletion of your ex's contact details (and vice-versa) from your cellphone. There are many roads to hell, some of them quite scenic, but none so well-worn and well-travelled as the one sign-posted "My ex and I are friends".

Careful, mind that banana skin.

Reply to John

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