Posted by: Charl | 2006/10/24

Tempted to get violent!

Hi Doc,

I am a manager with a team of people that I lead. Ever since I joined the company (approx 2 yrs ago) I have a staff member who has been testing my patience and straining my nerves.
I have noticed that the person takes on the same confrontation attitude with other people in the establishment

Any instruction giving to this individual by myself is always questioned and not immediately actioned. The staff member has no respect for me and resorts to Belligerent behaviour .- which I addressed with her in a non confrontational manner, she attributed this to having a strong personality.

This type of behaviour subsides and then resurfaces. I have addressed the matter with our HR dept who sat this individual down to ascertain the root of the problem. It seems this individual has a problem with the whole world. In short a MOANER & GROANER.

For the past week this staff member has been irritating the hell out of me and I have been tempted to put my fist into her face.

Please can you advise how does one deal with a person who thinks they know everything and want things done their way, without listening to reason? A person who is obnoxious, bullying and a royal pain in the butt. Short of grabbing her by the collar and throwing her through my office window, how do I handle this human animal?

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Our expert says:
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She's making feeble excuses, of course. A srong personality can contro themselves, and does NOT respond so belligerently. Can't you discuss this problem ( which is probably well recognized within the company at large ) with YOUR boss, and with the HR folks ? And make sure you record her confrontational and aggressive characteristic responses in her record. And simply make it clear to her, on record, that sbhe is expected to be polite and to carry out instructions, without being confrontational or challenging, if she is to be of any real use within any team

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Been there | 2006/10/25

All my sympathy. I had a young girl (22) like that working for me for nearly one year. She knew it all, did it all, and wanted it all. I nearly killed her one day.
The best advice will be to get rid of her. I found out she was visiting porn sites and webcams during working hours, so fired the dreaded little cow. All my other employees are more calm and happier since I dismissed her, and my b/p is back to normal. This one even use to have strange fits like pulling the hair out of her head, screaming and running around in the garden, trowing stones at the wall --- uuugghh no, never again!

Reply to Been there
Posted by: Charl | 2006/10/25

Thx Doc & Lady Nina.. I have taken heed to what you have said & will impliment the recomendations.

Thx a mil!!

Reply to Charl
Posted by: lady nina | 2006/10/25

hi there

i know what you feel, i have 2 teenagers at home...

i think to be a leader is to lead and get people to follow, you as the leader has more responsibility to keep calm and act on facts rather than emotions, a sure test for your leadership
but hey if you can learn how to swing this "strong personality" life might be a breeze after that, i very much doubt that what she thinks is a strong personality is a good personality, but see this as your challenge, how can ou be the kind of learder that she will respect and want to follow, i honestly believe that once you change your attitude and have victory in this area of your life, will she be removed from your life

be wise


Reply to lady nina

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