Posted by: twink | 2005/11/25

-|- tail of emotions...

i'm in a bad place today. ok, over-exaggeration. not really a BAD place, just a uneasy place.
i have my days where i'm ok and everything goes well, and i generally dont have a worry in the world. but lately i get very sad, and sombre and i just want to be alone. i stare out the window and random thoughts of "who i am, where am i going, what am i doing/" flash through my head.
i hate feeling like this. i think it may be happening because of things i've gone through in the past, but it's the worst feeling in the world being unsure of yourself and who you are.
today i feel as though i have no real place in this world. i feel i dont fit in, like there's no plan for me...
wy do i feel like this all the time. i just want to wake up happy, and feel great because i've had a good nights sleep, and not cruddy because i tossed and turned all night.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

YOu know, twink, I think we all have days like that, but if we have been misled into expecting that every day ought to be terrific, then it can be much harder to just shrig it off and say to yourself " OK, so it's a down day for me, tomorrow will be better".

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Our users say:
Posted by: Dee | 2005/11/25

Hey Twink

As you all know - I should be the last one to talk of lies and deception OR Retail Therapy!!!
I think my retail therapy days are over for a while.
But - you got dem blues and the whole bunch of us here know exactly how yo feel.

Tell you what - just go and put on your most melancholy music and have a very luxurious bubble bath and cry it all out - and then just go and have a deep precious sleep.

You will wake up feeling on top of the world.

I have been through the absolute pits this week - but was also obviously in a 'manic' mood cos I couldn't seem to care as much as I should - somehow I felt like stuff was happening and I was not really a part of it. It is just so strange how our kinked minds work.

You WILL feel better - it WILL go away - and you know it too!

Reply to Dee
Posted by: Delene | 2005/11/25

What i found so offensive, is that they asked me too? I mean they should know me by now.
SO it makes me wonder actually, If i know sumone is very honest, i would never ask that person to lie for me.
They asked me....what the hell do they think of me?

Reply to Delene
Posted by: Frusty | 2005/11/25

Delene, you are so like me, far too honest for your own doing. I would never dream of lying either. What's the point?
Hulle moet maar net --- en betaal, that's all!

Reply to Frusty
Posted by: Delene | 2005/11/25

Thats beautiful voyeur,

Frusty, its such a deurmekaar story, and yes, i am without a car at the moment, and its difficult.

I wasnt insured, but that guys insurance will pay.

Now i want to take out insurance for my car, i use it for the company, so its about R250 more a month cuz i use it for them. I say, the company must pay for it, they say no, i musnt tell the insurance its for business purposes as well.
I am no liar, i refuse to do that.
WHERE is there integrity?????????
I got such a gly in my company now, i'm telling you.

Reply to Delene
Posted by: twink | 2005/11/25

you guys are the bestest!

yup, it's that gnawing feeling like something is just waiting to happen. like a build up to a huge storm.

but taking it in all my stride, and trying to deal with it one day at a time is going to have be my only option.

Reply to twink
Posted by: Voyeur | 2005/11/25

Hi Twink
Just a little something I wrote for someone once when they were going through a rough patch...

You offered me your help
Which I chose to decline
And what I failed to do
Was offer you, mine
I don’t think I can actually help you
Or make your reasons go away
But I can be there for you…listen to you…
And comfort you with whatever emotions come your way
It’s times like this that seem the hardest
Trying to hold your head up and walk tall
And just as you manage to pick yourself up
There’s always something else which makes you fall
It’s times like this that make you wonder
If you’re being punished for something that you’ve done
It feels as though your troubles have no end
And soon give up on your life still to come
It’s times like this that the walls creep in on you
Suffocating and forbidding any chance of light
You wish you could truly believe people
When they tell you everything will be alright.
In times like this you need to tell yourself...enough is enough
No more giving to others…I must give to myself…
Take care of myself & remember you don’t have to be alone
Don’t give up on yourself…just take time out FOR YOURSELF

PS I would also opt for retail therapy...
hope your feeling subsides

Reply to Voyeur
Posted by: Frusty | 2005/11/25

Delene, I am so sorry to hear that. An accident no matter how big or small can leave you feeling shaken for a very long time. Funny pun in your last sentence, seeing as you don't have a car! I hope the insurance is paying! Have you at least driven again since then?

Reply to Frusty
Posted by: Delene | 2005/11/25

The car accident was last week Monday....On my way to a client.
a guy wacked in my gat in....I was standing still at a slipway waiting for a car to pass, my poor car is so crushed, the front door couldnt even open....

And i dunno when i get it back...drives me crazy

Reply to Delene
Posted by: Frusty | 2005/11/25

Hey Delene! Congratulations! Well done! They say that being a smoker is worse than being an addict. You have my respect and admiration. Keep it up!

By the way, when did you have the car accident and how?

Reply to Frusty
Posted by: Delene | 2005/11/25

No, its only 8 days.

Last week thursday had my last ciggy

Reply to Delene
Posted by: Delene | 2005/11/25

Hey twinky, hate this feeling quite abit.

I have been low as well, since my car accident actually. Since then, its just one thing after the other.
Havent smoked for 9 days.
I'm going a little nutty ......

Reply to Delene
Posted by: Frusty | 2005/11/25

Almost like foreboding? That kind of feeling? It sits in the pit of your stomach and eats at you. Phew! Hope it goes away soon.

Love your idea of retail therapy. Am busy doing some myself via internet!! Mmmm, choices! Can even buy shoes via internet!! Love it.

Reply to Frusty
Posted by: twink | 2005/11/25

go shopping...

i'm going shopping tonight. hoping that may help. you know, a little retail therapy....

but this is the type of feeling that wont go away. almost like an uneasiness. like something horrible is about to happen.

Reply to twink
Posted by: Frusty | 2005/11/25

Ahhh, sleep depravation! Monster evil! It makes you go around in circles. Can't sleep because of your thoughts and therefore your thoughts get worse.

What do you normally do to relax?

Reply to Frusty

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