Our expert says:
Obviously you can be helpful and supportive, but you are not a therapist --- surely he ought to be seeing a good local counsellor right now. And this is clearly a bad time for you, too, so you are less able to think only of him and his needs. Seeing a shrink for yourself is an excellent idea, but he also needs to see a shrink --- and a different one, so things don't get comple with any conflict of interest. Discourage him from drinking, as this does NOT help, no ever --- it makes him more depressed and more disinhibited. He should not consider you as "his only lifeline" and needs to build others, including his own personal therapist
Anon makes several good points, including the reference to the Compassionate Friends, a group specially for people who have lost a child, at any age
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