Posted by: Lindie | 2005/07/08

Strong Willed Child

I have a daughter of 4.5 who is very good generally, but if you tell her not to do something for whatever reason and she doesn't like it, she will block you out and keep on doing it. When i dicsipline her she will be cheeky and talk back to me. How do i handle this, she is 80% of the time very good and easy to manage, but she is very strong willed, i just feel that i need to adress is now before it is too late.

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Our expert says:
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Try to get acess to DSTV before the series ends, and watch the Friday night sBBC TV series "Little ANgels": which is th best thing yet shown on how to deal with problem behaviour in children ( and check the archives of this forum to read my previous posts about this, where I have described the approach they use).
Youre right to want to deal with this before it becomes too much of an engrained habit. And as Lerita says, start a star chart, which records the times she has been obedient, and add up towards a reward ( not too generous !) and black marks when she disobeys. Don't pay attention to the tem[per tantrums and speaking back, and on matters that matter, don't argue. Tell her what to do once nicely, a second time sternly, explaining that if she doesn't do what she needs to do, she'll be put in her room on her own. And the 3rd time --- put her in her room for 5 minutes, then fetch her back and carry on where you left of. And praise her with cuddles and fuss, whenever she DOES do what you want.

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Our users say:
Posted by: lerita | 2005/07/08

Take her priviledges away. Like no more TV or DVD. Start a star system. Take a calender or a piece of paper(divided in blocks). Award her stars for good behaviour. Like you made your bed one star (R2.00). At the end of the month she have Xmount that she can spend on toys. I have heard good comments about the book mentioned. Ask your local library if they have it in their collection

Reply to lerita
Posted by: A | 2005/07/08

Get a Book called Raising Your Spirited child by Mary Kurcinka - it has helped me a lot

Reply to A
Posted by: * | 2005/07/08

Go to the Parenting Forum!!

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