Posted by: Greyhound | 2012/11/21

Stories people spread

I am so distraught. I have been in a relationship with a wonderful guy for almost a year. The problem is that we have at different times been involved with members of the same family. Since we have been together, they have been giving him stories about what I supposedly was doing to my late ex husband. They make it sound so convincing and I cannot really blame him for believing their stories, but it is all blatant lies. The family member who is spreading these lies also worked with me and he was involved with her daughter. I cannot believe that people could be so devious! I don''t know if I should confront her again, because I did previously ask her to stop talking about my private affairs at work. If I do, it might look like I am guilty of something that I am not even sure of this time around. It just drives me so mad and sad at the same time! It also proves a problem to convince him that I am not the sleazy, slutty person that they make me out to be. I love him so much and we are happy together, but every time somebody says something about me, his suspicion flares up again.

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Our expert says:
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So his family doesn't like you, resent the relationship and are trying to end it ? Something also sounds rather incestuous ( psychologically if not genetically ) in the complexity of the inter-relationships here.
Why not simply chat calmly with him about what is going on, and about how distressed you are about the feling that others are interfering in your relationship, and feeding him false gossip about you, and work this out between you That's surely be much more useful than "confronting" others.

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