Our expert says:
Why are you still insisting on giving such enormous power to this unworthy guy ? What you are describing is a situation in which, with no respect whatever for your own autonomy, you have given him total dictatorial power over you, and you are insisting on thinking of him with evry excuse you can find. This is not required or unavoidable. No tablets from any doctor can change this, especiall as it doesnt sound at all as though you want this to change. Counselling is what is needed.
Yes, you should be able to seek hospital admission, if you feel that desperate, either through your medical aid, or through a government / provincial hospital casualty.
Lixa makes excellent sense, as usual, though the laws regarding compulsory admission, or voluntary committment apply to all hospitals - maybe some government hospitals insist on invoking it in all such emergency admission, which they don't strictly HAVE to do, but the laws apply everywhere, and should help to protect people in a vulnerable state.
You WILL, if you allow it to happen, be able to get through this crisis and to find greater and more secure happiness on the other side. Just at present, what you're describing sopunds like a dug addict when they cant get their supply of heoin. This sense of desperation will pass, and you can recover your personal security and autonomy, and learn never to give it away again. You can love without becoming this much at risk if it doesn't work out.
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