Our expert says:
Good to hear from you again. You know, I have a problem with my PO Box. Apart from the customary negligence of the Post Office, I get a lot of junk mail, and of mis-addressed mail addressed to other people. Sometimes, when I return that mail to sender, it still gets mindlessly returned to me. And it sounds similar with you ---when your parents or others send you negative messages, instead of marking them "Return to Sender" you read them, clasp them to your bosom, and assume them to be true, significant and about you --- instead of recognizing that they are untrue, insignificant, and about THEM. Your parents, and others, can only make you feel bad about yourself if you allow them to do so.
YOur sistser ought to be standing on her own hind-quarters, and not sponging off you --- she shouldn't be able to embarass you in front of friends, because she shouldn't be with you and your friends, but on her own. So now she wants a place of her own -- great ! But how lazy is she ? SHE must look for it, find it, and find a way of paying for it --- and move out from your place. If that falls through, and you think of allowing her to stay in your place while you work abroad, this must only be on condition that she pays full rent that covers all your bond payments and enough extra to cover all expenses, and that she will move out when you return.
Congratulations on the overseas job interview --- they wouldn't dream of such an interview unless they recognize and value your skills. And serve your currrent boss right for neglecting you, overloading and under-appreciating you.
Dont blame yourself in the least if your overseas work disturbs their wildly unrealistic dream and forces them to face realitry. Why doesn't your sister live with them, instead of wasting their savings on providing for her. Will she ever bother to support herself ?
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