Posted by: Maia | 2009/09/07

So frustrated

Boyfriend is going through a messy divorce financially in terms of splitting assets.

Weve been together nearly 2 years. He has always been a bit afraid to commit and has cheated on me. He says that we have found true love and that once he sorts his issues out he will be in a much better place to commit.

Problem is that I cant seem to do anything right in terms of what he ' needs'  from me - support, love, friendship. We had a major fight this weekend because he says I lied to him and ignored him, which in my heart I know I didnt do and actually feel like he caused a fight over nothing. My pride means I will defend my actions to death, I wont just roll over and say sorry for something I havent done.

He has divorce trial this week and now Im getting accused of not being there when he needs me the most. I should be able to let my fight go and ' show'  him how much I love him.

Its emotional blackmail, and I feel so strongly about what I didnt do wrong that I cant let it go. Now this is the BIGGEST week in terms of our relationship and I ' cant'  be there emotionally for him. What do I do, it will get used against me forever that in his moment of need I wasnt the support structure he needed.

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Our expert says:
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Hasn't your affair with this married man been one of the reasons for his mariage problems and divorce ? What makes folks who have affairs with married people assume that the cheater won't in turn cheat on them ?

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