Our expert says:
Do call Lifeline ( number provided on this page ) to talk through this, and explore alternatives. Check out possibilities for free or low-cost counselling, to help you further. You don't mention why you "refuse" to go back on antidepresants, so I'm no sure why that, of various alternatives, should be ruled out. A skilled counselor can help you readily learn how to calm yourself down, without using chemicals. And such a counsellor can also help you to improve your coping skills ( sounds like you've already coped with many burdens in life so far ) and to handle the current challenges as well as possible.
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