Our expert says:
Sounds like you are keeping her AWFULLY busy for a kid of 4 --- they have a highly important job to do, being a child, and playing, which is essential, and shouldn't always be structured and organized. Sounds like you may be pushing her a bit more than would be desirable, and it seems you really identify with her and want her to hav every advantage you ever had, at whatever age, and then some. It is no helpful for a child at that age to be placed into an executive decision-making role. Be a mom as well as a friend.
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