Posted by: meldee | 2009/09/14

Should I be worried

I found tablets in my husband' s wallet and I researched them and found them to be for erectile disfunction. He is 46 years old (I' m 35) and in the past 16 yrs I' ve known him we' ve never had sex problems. Should I question him about it knowing he' s not a person to discuss such things with me, he' s a very closed person even though he pretends to be open about any issue. And if I do confront him and still doesn' t open that door, should I let it be? It' s not the first instance I' ve seen strange tablets with him, the previous time it was some chinese ones and even then he was not aware that I know of them.

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Our expert says:
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Well, erectile dysfunction is common, and some men are too shy to want to talk about the problem or to admit they are using medicine for it. Why would you wan to CONFRONT him about this ? If he found that you were using some medication for some female problem, surely he wouldn't want to CONFRONT you about it ? I wish someone would find whoever it is who is going round encouraging people to CONFRONT each other, and confront them
The strange chinese pills you noticed may have been something he was trying for the same sort of problem, though they are generally not so useful.
If these are proper tablets prescribed by a doctor ( no such tabs are available without prescription ) then you should have nothing to worry about. If, as Liza says, there is reason to believe they are something odd obtrained over the internet, that would have risks as would any type of off medicine obtained without proper prescription and not from a proper pharmacy.
Really also raises useful points. And I was also wondering why you seem to have been going through his wallet fairly frequently --- that suggests something's not quite right within the relationship. Couples counselling would surely be useful

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Posted by: Really | 2009/09/14

It sounds as though there is a problem. Maybe he is going through some ' man things' , you know, he probably is having trouble getting *t up and maybe worried to speak to you about it. Some men usually have bigger issues with telling their partners about the condition more than knowing they actually have the condition, and would rather try and deal with it on their own, unfortunately, this rarely works.

True, you need to find a way to approach him about your discovery and make him understand that you two can deal with it best way you can. He is probably going to be very angry that you discovered this!

By the way, why were you going through his wallet? I am not being nasty, but just trying to establish the reason for this behaviour! Is it that you were suspicious that something might be going on? Whatever reason pushed you to look through his wallet should be reason enough for you to begin a discussion regarding this issue.

Expect him to be defensive, maybe even deny it....But somehowm you TWO will have to deal with it.


Good Luck.

Reply to Really
Posted by: Liza | 2009/09/14

You should definitely be worried - but not for the reasons you might think. It sounds like he is purchasing counterfeit medication - probably over the internet. This is a very dangerous practice since there is no control over what is actually put into the tablets. I' ve heard of counterfeit medication that contained road paint! That is not even the most dangerous substance found. Others include well-known poisons in sufficient doses to cause death!

Perhaps it would be a good idea to get some couples counseling so that you can raise your questions in a non-confrontational manner. Confronting someone is generally a bad idea.

Good Luck

Reply to Liza

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