Posted by: JB | 2008/11/05

Sexless marriage

I am in a marriage where we never have sex, and we don' y even talk about sex. You see I want more sex because I am not getting any sex and I fear that if I wont get sex I will maybe start an affair or even leave my wife. We have been married for 2 years and I get sex maybe once in a month, I would like ro have it more often.Almost daily would suit me,How do I tell my wife that I want more sex, how do i go about discussing such an issue.WHAT DO IS SAY AND WHAT NOT?

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Our expert says:
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Well, if you're not getting any, you couldn't have any less, and its entirely reasonable that you'd want more. Has your wife been reluctant to have sex from the start of your relationship, or is this a more recent change ?
There's no solution that wouldn't have to start with discussing this calmly with her --as soul says. Its possible she has a low level of libido anyway ; or that she was molested as a child and is scared of sex, or that she has a minor gynae condition that makes it unduly uncomfortable for her. Be sympathetic, as she's not likely to be denying sex to you simply in order to frustrate or annoy you. Encourage her strongly to join with you in seeing a marriage counsellor, to enhance the srelationship in general, and explore the sexual issues within that counselling

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Our users say:
Posted by: Opinion | 2008/11/05

Oooh - you should still be on honeymoon! Are you 100% sure that all is well in the other areas of your relationship? Have you tried the romancing and caring?
Too often couples forget mutual respect - simple things like please and thank you, and I love you, thanks for sharing my life. Small gestures of appreciation.
An open discussion about your relationship and where it is going should help. If you can' t talk, write a letter - just remember to give it with a hug and a flower.
I do not believe that all is well - sorry - maybe the both of you should see a marriage counsellor - one does not make a life commitment to a partner and then talk about infidelity without having tried - at least give it your best shot.
Good luck!!

Reply to Opinion
Posted by: Soul | 2008/11/05

There is no easy way to say it. You need to tell your wife that you folks need to have a serious talk and you need to tell her, speak from the heart and tell her what you feeling. Find out if there may be a problem and discuss it.

She is your wife you should be able to discuss everything with her.

Reply to Soul

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